Mess Deck: General Section > Humour
Purgative Properties
Baldrick:
Downloading the site is now very very slow. Could it be that we have a Lifeboatburg ( similar to a fatburg but more sinister ) circulating through the forum system ? perhaps causing blockages and overloading it ? If so perhaps we could administer a large dose of this stuff . It worked for me but don't stand too close for 12 hours. .
Neil:
yes........I've just rebooted my pooter as it was very slow...........bit faster now but not up to usual speed.
ballastanksian:
Maybe a course of Senekot will make our computers a bit more regular?
jaymac:
Or if you are good at maths just work it out with a Pencil
tigertiger:
Slow computers may be down to a recent security update.
Two bugs (not viruses) named Meltdown and Spectre were discovered in Intel and most other cpu chips (including phones). This created a security flaw. A patch has been developed but it slows down computers.
More here https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2018/jan/04/meltdown-spectre-worst-cpu-bugs-ever-found-affect-computers-intel-processors-security-flaw
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