Topic: jokes from the real life (Read 11894 times)

Abuelo3 · « **on:** February 08, 2008, 09:05:55 pm »

This is a true history...
When I was a young and innocent medical student, the time to face with Psychiatric disorder come thru, so, in the very first day at the psychiatric Hospital, the alumni get words of advice about the correct behavior, the Teacher was determinant, never and anybody can be alone at the violent patients gates at any time, it was to much for our pour and innocents souls. :angel:
We look at that area of the Hospital with an fear expression and that moment we hear a lot of voices, like a inferno chorus, they said :seven-seven-seven-seven.
I wrote that I was young and innocent; I have to know, I have to learn, so, I walk to the forbidden gate, I pulll some kind of chain , those Little window was open, I have to see, I put my face at that window and suddenly I get a hit in my eyes, the inferno chorus began to said, eighth, eighth, eighth.
This is a true history

Wetwater · « **Reply #1 on:** February 08, 2008, 11:22:21 pm »

Nice one Godo.

How many more fell for it.

White Ensign · « **Reply #2 on:** February 09, 2008, 10:56:54 am »

When my granny was still alive, she always claimed to my mom that her eyes become worst day by day. I have to explain, that my granny was absolutely fantastic to us as her grandchildren, but she could be the hell to my parents as well. So after 2 weeks of moaning my mom had enough. She arranged a date for check-up at the local eye specialist. The doc checked her eyes and said to my mom after a while: "That`ll be easy to solve". He took off the glasses of granny and cleaned them. "Much better", she nodded. My mom was so in shame that she had forgotten to clean her mothers glasses. She paid the full charge, saying that it was the most expensive cleaning agent she`d ever had.

Most in our family wear glasses and always somebody is rubbing his eyes everybody come up with: "Did you have cleaned your glasses?".
My moms face still turns red when this story is told, even 14 years after my grandmom had passed away.

Abuelo3 · « **Reply #3 on:** May 07, 2008, 10:24:25 pm »

Hello to Everyone
The jokes from the real life, let me tell something about it, I'm 54 years, I have a wife who is a beautifully person, 3 daughters, an fine job with decent salary, but the last week Found that I have cancer in the prostate, being a MD, I know what it is my future life, but aI have my model ship building to be nice and save my sanity, when I fell sad, I look for things like this part of the forum, so, I must to said Thank You very much for post those jokes, for show me those splendid models and for kind time to read me.
Best wishes

Colin Bishop · « **Reply #4 on:** May 07, 2008, 10:36:37 pm »

Godo, that is terrible. Is your condition treatable at this stage? Much depends on how far it has progressed.

Everyone here wishes you all the very best.

Colin

malcolmfrary · « **Reply #5 on:** May 07, 2008, 11:58:57 pm »

Back in the '70's, one of the installations I looked after was being extended, and the sales department had the idea of parking a caravan in the comound as a temporary shop to get as much of the extension earning as soon as possible. It was manned by two very decorative young ladies.
One day, about brew time, when the lads who worked in the area had gathered in the canteen to refresh themselves and discuss the nature of the world, we heard the tap tap tap of stillettoes in the corridor. Conversation slowed, and one of the sales girls looked in.
"Has anybody got a red felt tip?" she asked.
For about three seconds there was total silence then someone made a choking noise. She went bright red and vanished.
We never saw her again.

djrobbo · « **Reply #6 on:** May 08, 2008, 01:53:09 pm »

Sorry to hear of your health problem godo , we wish you well ,

on a similar vein of thought , a few years ago i sent one of my lads from the workshop down to curry's ( large electrical shops ) for a cordless extension lead

turned out it caused more aggro to the staff at currys than it did to my lad , apparently no one twigged and they were running about like headless chickens trying to find one , problem was the manager was one of my customers and i didn't know , didn't half lay into me when he brought his car in for an m.o.t

worth it..??????? course it was , the trouser wetting merriment was priceless

regards.bob.

DickyD · « **Reply #7 on:** May 08, 2008, 02:47:32 pm »

Sorry to hear of your illness Godo. I still value your words of advice about mine.
Keep up with the boat building and keep that sense of humour of yours.
My best to you and your family.

Martin (Admin) · « **Reply #8 on:** May 08, 2008, 05:52:14 pm »

Yes we all wish you well with your treatment Godo.
And just goes to show none of us should take things like that for granted and checkup for
anything suspicious is the order of the day no matter how reluctant or stubborn we males are!

Some of those old apprentice pranks always made me laugh;
Go to stores and ask for a long wait.
Get a bag of sparks for the grinder.
We need a box of holes for these washers.
Get me a 4 inch sky hook.
we need some stripped paint to match the wallpaper.
...and the good old clapping your hands behind his head when someone is
going to switch something on for the first time!

djrobbo · « **Reply #9 on:** May 08, 2008, 07:37:34 pm »

Hi martin..........go down to the boiler house and get me a bucket of steam

..........always good for a laugh

regards...bob.

tigertiger · « **Reply #10 on:** May 09, 2008, 04:22:20 am »

I have just been down to my local hardware store (in China), to buy some solvent glue for UPVc.

WWWWWWWOOOOOOOooooooowwwwwww

wombat · « **Reply #11 on:** May 09, 2008, 04:23:25 pm »

Apprentice tricks....

At Mullards, one poor lad was sent from one end of the factory to stores at the other.....

"Go and get a bucket of spots for the spot welder"

off he goes

"Bucket of spots for the spot welder please"
"What size?" says the storeman
"Dunno"
"Well you had better go and find out"

back to the other end

"What size do you want"
"Large"

and back to stores

"He wants large"
"Haven't got any large, go and ask if medium will do"

by this time chummy was starting to catch on

Another one was told that because we were part of Philips, all management meetings were conducted in dutch. Next morning he appeared with a dutch phrase book.

Hope the health works out Godo.

Abuelo3 · « **Reply #12 on:** May 09, 2008, 07:48:27 pm »

Hello everyone.
At this special part of my life I had learned the true meaning of some words, words like friendship, THANKS, so, I have, I like to said to everyone: Friends, thank you very much.
I'm in the moment that I have to discuss with my fellows MD the beginning of the therapy, and of course with mi Wife, some dude spoke careless in front of my Lady, who is very unsent about the disease, this dude said something about the therapeutic radiation, my Wife ask about the secondary damage that can cause this therapy, and I said to Her, Dear Lady, dont worry about it, maybe and after a good amount of radiation, just that tiny part of my body, the thing that is use to make baby's is going to bright and shine in the dark.... ::)
Best wishes

Roger in France · « **Reply #13 on:** May 09, 2008, 07:56:49 pm »

That's it Godo, see the funny side of life. It makes all the difference between the miserable sick and the survivors!

All the best dear friend.

Roger in France.

Shipmate60 · « **Reply #14 on:** May 09, 2008, 07:59:14 pm »

Hope it wont glow too much.
Thinking of you at this time.

Bob

Tug-Kenny RIP · « **Reply #15 on:** May 09, 2008, 08:43:48 pm »

Thinking of you Godo.

What a lovely disposition.

All the best in your course of treatment. Don't glow too much

Ken

Martin (Admin) · « **Reply #16 on:** May 10, 2008, 12:43:41 am »

Quote from: Godo on May 09, 2008, 07:48:27 pm

...... going to bright and shine in the dark.... ::)

Er ... is now a good time to mention we are hoping to have a night sail at the Wicksteed park big sail in?!?! ::)

All our sincerest regards Godo

Abuelo3 · « **Reply #17 on:** July 10, 2008, 07:40:53 pm »

{-)Hello to everyone
I'm a loky son of...the Cancer was concealed, it is meaning that not any other part of my body has it, I was at surgery and all go to the elimination of the disease, a month after the surgery I am capable to be a husband again, just because the cancer was detected in good time, so a beg to all You, if you are 38 years old, please go to the Doctor and ask for the determination of the PROSTATIC ANTIGEN.
So I was a good patient, a toke all mi medicine, and my Wife give me two, yes 2 PT boats, two radios, running gear. escand batteries, the life is good and I can drink 2 oz of rum every Saturday

Best wishes.

Colin Bishop · « **Reply #18 on:** July 10, 2008, 08:06:45 pm »

That's great news Godo, I'm sure I speak for everyone on Mayhem when I say how pleased we are to hear it. Great news about the delivery of twins too - you certainly are a versatile guy!

DickyD · « **Reply #19 on:** July 10, 2008, 08:22:22 pm »

The best news ever Godo, congratulations. We can now look forward to many years of you keeping an eye on our health.

Shipmate60 · « **Reply #20 on:** July 10, 2008, 08:30:47 pm »

That is really good news.
So now you can make up for the lost time

Bob

barryfoote · « **Reply #21 on:** July 11, 2008, 08:15:51 am »

Godo,

Your good news literally, and I am not ashamed to say it, brought a tear to my eye. I am, as we all are, absolutely delighted for you.

Barry

Martin (Admin) · « **Reply #22 on:** July 11, 2008, 09:32:04 am »

Great news Godo..... have the weekend off!

Abuelo3 · « **Reply #23 on:** August 05, 2008, 10:13:22 pm »

Hey ,Hey, I'm back,I'm here, 3 month after the Pathologist said time that "you have an Adecocarcinoma de prostate(it is cancer)" I'm at work again

::)

, thank you from the botton of my heart for yours health wishes and kind friendship.
When I was at the Hospital, I get very strong medicine for the pain, so I have a nail at my hand for 6 days,one nigth a pretty and young Nurse was very near to my face, in order to check the fluids and the nail in my hand or the intravenous, so I was intoxicated with medicine, I thogth that She was my wife so a kiss her in the mouth, She did not do nothing, just keep busy, She never come back, but the chief nurse, the Jefa, Nurse in comand The old lady nurse who knows how to, come to my room in the morning and said that She must tell that to my wife

, my Wife said yesterday that She have to talk about some curios item that happen at the hospital this nigth,

Tomorrow I 'll tell about, if it is about the kiss or what, I began to fill bad, maybe a need to stay here at my hospital :angel:

GaryM · « **Reply #24 on:** August 05, 2008, 10:17:58 pm »

:)

regards
Gary :)

News:

Author Topic: jokes from the real life (Read 11894 times)

djrobbo

djrobbo

Roger in France

barryfoote

GaryM