Model Boat Mayhem

Mess Deck: General Section => Chit-Chat => Topic started by: essex2visuvesi on May 25, 2012, 03:22:04 pm

Title: Its friday and I was bored :)
Post by: essex2visuvesi on May 25, 2012, 03:22:04 pm
received this in my email a little while back


From: mclaimdepart@gmail.com
Subject: Congratulations from members and staff of our company
Date: Fri, 25 May 2012 09:32:46 -0400

P M M C ONLINE DRAW
POX 235LU. LARUIA
LIVERPOOL, L70 1NL
UNITED KINGDOM
(Customer Services)
Ref: UK/9920X3/2011
Batch: 085/06/FSX20
                                                                    BTL NOTIFICATION DESK
We happily announce to you the draw (#1070) of the P M M C ONLINE DRAW, online Sweepstakes International program held on Wednesday 23th of May 2012.
 
Your e-mail address attached to ticket number: 139573490206 750 with Serial number 1395/09 drew the lucky numbers: 04 17 26 30 34 bonus number 09, which subsequently happen to be among our lucky selected email address in the online draw in the 1st category i.e. match 6.
 
You have therefore been approved to claim a total sum of Ј1,000, 000(One Million Pounds) in cash credited to file ZXT/1395700117/09. This is from a total cash prize of Ј10,000,000 shared amongst the (10) lucky winners in this category i.e. Match 6. All participants for the online version were selected randomly from World Wide Web sites through computer draw system and extracted from over 100,000 unions, individuals, associations, and corporate bodies that are listed online. This promotion takes place once in a year.
 
Please note that your lucky winning number falls within our European booklet in United Kingdom liverpool  In view of this, your Ј1,000, 000(One Million Pounds) would be released to you by our Attorney.
Do send us your full name and contact number and you will be contacted by our attorney.
 
Our agent will immediately commence the process to facilitate the release of your funds as soon as you send the required details. For security reasons, you`re advised to keep your winning information confidential till your claims is processed and your money remitted to you .
 
Congratulations from me and members of staff of P M M C ONLINE DRAW.
 
Yours faithfully,
Mrs. Grace Johnson


Wonderful news I thought.... now I don't normally reply to these but today I thought I would make an exception

Hi there what excellent news :) I really could do with the money right now
We are both in luck as I am actually just up the road in Birkenhead.
To save everyone hassle please let me have the address of your attorney and I will come and collect my cash prize personally!
I don't mind which denomination GBP, Euros or US$ as I see quite a bit of travel in my future but could you ensure they are in fresh new bundles as they look better when you whip them out in the pub

Many thanks
Title: Re: Its friday and I was bored :)
Post by: Bob K on May 25, 2012, 05:32:13 pm
Well Done  {-)

I keep getting 'dodgy' phone calls that evade the Telephone Preference Service by calling from abroad with a witheld number.  Often three a day.  You know the kind, start off by trying to confirm your name and address then attempting to roll out some time wasting chat before getting down to the real 'scam'.  ie:  I am supposed to have had a recent car accident, and would I like to defraud an insurance company ?  (Not in those words though).

If I am bored I try to sound interested, taking up as much of their time as possible without giving any personal details, then 'to establish this call is genuine' (gets their interest) write down as much info about his name, the company name, exactly where in the UK he is calling from etc.   Meanwhile I am on Google confirming that no such UK organisation exists. 

When I have pushed his patience to the limit I enjoy telling him that no such company exists, that he is calling from an unlisted overseas number, and that I will be reporting him for attempted fraud.  It definitely annoys them !!!!

Makes my day  {-)  O0  :-))
Title: Re: Its friday and I was bored :)
Post by: ACTion on May 25, 2012, 06:45:49 pm
Well Done  {-)

I keep getting 'dodgy' phone calls that evade the Telephone Preference Service by calling from abroad with a witheld number.  Often three a day.  You know the kind, start off by trying to confirm your name and address then attempting to roll out some time wasting chat before getting down to the real 'scam'.  ie:  I am supposed to have had a recent car accident, and would I like to defraud an insurance company ?  (Not in those words though).

If I am bored I try to sound interested, taking up as much of their time as possible without giving any personal details, then 'to establish this call is genuine' (gets their interest) write down as much info about his name, the company name, exactly where in the UK he is calling from etc.   Meanwhile I am on Google confirming that no such UK organisation exists. 

When I have pushed his patience to the limit I enjoy telling him that no such company exists, that he is calling from an unlisted overseas number, and that I will be reporting him for attempted fraud.  It definitely annoys them !!!!

Makes my day  {-)  O0  :-))

I adopt a simpler approach - I say "Congratulations! You've just reached the world's rudest man!" and then I proceed to demonstrate it if they don't hang up straight away. Works for me.
DM
Title: Re: Its friday and I was bored :)
Post by: pettyofficernick on May 25, 2012, 10:34:29 pm
I have an 'app, on my mobile phone, which, at a press of the star key, callers are put on hold and played music until they hang up. Easy, when you realise someone is trying to flog you something you don't need or want, just say ' can I just put you on hold for a minute while I put the cat out/ switch the kettle off or something along those lines, quick press of the star key and then forget about them, they are paying for the call after all, they will soon get the message. I would love to have an extremely involved options menu like they have at banks, utility companies etc, a super deterrent to cold callers.....Welcome to Nicks phone,
                                                                                                                If you are the wife, press option 1
                                                                                                                If you are one of my mates, select option 2
                                                                                                                If you are my boss, please select option 3
                                                                                                                For anything else, press option 4
                                                                                                 Option 4   If you are my psychiatrist, select option 1
                                                                                                                If you are the Police, please select option 2
                                                                                                                If you are the phone company, select option3
                                                                                                                If you are a telesales rep, please select option 4
                                                                                        Option 4 (again) If you are selling insurance, press option 1
                                                                                                                If you are selling phones select option 2
                                                                                                                If you are still here and still want to try and sell me something, select option 3
                                                                                                               
The final answers to the last series of options could be either ' I am very busy at the moment, please stay on the line and I will answer you call as soon as possible' or 'not interested anyway pal' and automatically hang up. :-)) :-)) :-))   
Title: Re: Its friday and I was bored :)
Post by: RAAArtyGunner on May 25, 2012, 10:59:33 pm
I have an 'app, on my mobile phone, which, at a press of the star key, callers are put on hold and played music until they hang up. Easy, when you realise someone is trying to flog you something you don't need or want, just say ' can I just put you on hold for a minute while I put the cat out/ switch the kettle off or something along those lines, quick press of the star key and then forget about them, they are paying for the call after all, they will soon get the message. I would love to have an extremely involved options menu like they have at banks, utility companies etc, a super deterrent to cold callers.....Welcome to Nicks phone,
                                                                                                                If you are the wife, press option 1
                                                                                                                If you are one of my mates, select option 2
                                                                                                                If you are my boss, please select option 3
                                                                                                                For anything else, press option 4
                                                                                                 Option 4   If you are my psychiatrist, select option 1
                                                                                                                If you are the Police, please select option 2
                                                                                                                If you are the phone company, select option3
                                                                                                                If you are a telesales rep, please select option 4
                                                                                        Option 4 (again) If you are selling insurance, press option 1
                                                                                                                If you are selling phones select option 2
                                                                                                                If you are still here and still want to try and sell me something, select option 3
                                                                                                               
The final answers to the last series of options could be either ' I am very busy at the moment, please stay on the line and I will answer you call as soon as possible' or 'not interested anyway pal' and automatically hang up. :-)) :-)) :-))   

No reason why you can't record a similar type message on an answering machine.
Problem is how do legitimate callers get through, bypass the message,  that you don't know
Title: Re: Its friday and I was bored :)
Post by: Neil on May 25, 2012, 11:14:06 pm
I just tell them to f*** ***...........usually works {-) {-) {-) {-) {-) {-)
Title: Re: Its friday and I was bored :)
Post by: steam up on May 25, 2012, 11:43:45 pm
I do enjoy junk mail,
simple game save the mail then response but swap the envelopes  so that the double glazing company gets the response for for the insurance company.
Title: Re: Its friday and I was bored :)
Post by: Bob K on May 26, 2012, 12:16:31 am
I do enjoy junk mail,
simple game save the mail then response but swap the envelopes  so that the double glazing company gets the response for for the insurance company.

Great idea !   But is it worth wasting time filling in the forms first ?  And don't forget to include some daily take-away leaflets in the envelopes.

Benifits Royal Mail, promotes the take-aways, but most of all cuts local borough recycling costs as well.  Half of what I put out for recycling seems to be junk through my letter box, including loads of 'free' newspapers and collection bags.
Title: Re: Its friday and I was bored :)
Post by: Bob K on May 26, 2012, 12:23:13 am
I have an 'app, on my mobile phone, which, at a press of the star key, callers are put on hold and played music until they hang up. Easy, when you realise someone is trying to flog you something you don't need or want, just say ' can I just put you on hold for a minute while I put the cat out/ switch the kettle off or something along those lines, quick press of the star key and then forget about them, they are paying for the call after all, they will soon get the message. I would love to have an extremely involved options menu like they have at banks, utility companies etc, a super deterrent to cold callers.....Welcome to Nicks phone,
. . . . .                                           
The final answers to the last series of options could be either ' I am very busy at the moment, please stay on the line and I will answer you call as soon as possible' or 'not interested anyway pal' and automatically hang up. :-)) :-)) :-))   

Great set of answerphone options from a school in Queensland

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7C5Rnb7J3sU (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7C5Rnb7J3sU)
Title: Re: Its friday and I was bored :)
Post by: Norseman on May 26, 2012, 02:27:34 am
I have an app' fitted -
the house phone rings then my brain cuts in and says
'it's either for the kids or a beeping sales pitch' - my backside remains on the couch.

If I want someone to ring me then they will have my mobile number - Simples

Dave
Title: Re: Its friday and I was bored :)
Post by: dodgy geezer on May 26, 2012, 08:01:48 am

Wonderful news I thought.... now I don't normally reply to these but today I thought I would make an exception


I'm not sure that this is a good idea. These approaches are simply sent out as bait. While they are really happy if you believe the initial scam, simply responding means that they think they may be able to get a dialogue going, and your address will probably be entered on a list for further attempts. At the least it will be sold on - valid email addresses which gather a response (of any kind) are worth money to spam marketers...
Title: Re: Its friday and I was bored :)
Post by: essex2visuvesi on May 26, 2012, 08:26:38 am
I do enjoy junk mail,
simple game save the mail then response but swap the envelopes  so that the double glazing company gets the response for for the insurance company.

Lee evans on Junk mail
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAoNOprIvNw

Very very funny but does contain naughty words
Title: Re: Its friday and I was bored :)
Post by: sjoormen on May 26, 2012, 03:30:21 pm
 {-) {-) {-) {-) {-)
you made my day :-)) :-))
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zc6vJTX3JQU&feature=channel&list=UL