Dear PMK,
Firstly, I understand and sympathise with all that you say.
Personally, I get just as upset over loosing £3 just as I would do £300 (I am deadly serious), it's the Principal of the thing. No, I have not 'lost' too much over eBay, probably only £30 or so Pounds in five years, however, I have lost very considerably more from time to time in normal day/day business over the last twenty five years or more, but, such is life... there is always someone out there who will do their damnedest to take something from you, and life experience eventually gives one the wherewithall and insight to reduce such exposure to a minimum. As to trusting larger Co.'s and known names, I treat them with just as much caution as anybody: Scottish Power being one that I have never trusted... having presently 'an issue' with them where they have obviously got upset/revengeful that the tenant has changed to another supplier (the tenant had asked my permission), and SP are trying to claiming back amounts over four years even though I paid everything in total on the 1/11/08... what is worse, they are even claiming I owe for some elec. on this property before it was even built and connected!!!
Never trust SP bills (I never have), always send letters of importance Signed For or Special Delivery (their response time and reply paperwork is very poor), and I would advise - from past experience - to always treat them with distrust (they seem to run with 'if in doubt make it up'! - less office time/trouble to do so isn't it! - and they gamble that no-one will stand up to them).
I don't think anyone has been derogatory, clever, or gloating in anything that has been said under this Subject. I certainly never wrote with such feeling, and I am sorry if it came over that way as it was certainly never intended, and I am sure Roger likewise. I did however, intend to help by possibly giving some additional insight, since I stand by what I said in that I do consider eBay a good and useful service. Yes, there was a set of DVD's I wanted (£80), and it didn't arrive of course and I was obviously 'worried/annoyed', so I proceeded with the normal chase emails to the Seller... and yes there were no replies. So, whilst at the same time as contacting eBay and PayPal, I 'attacked' the Seller with more forceful legal words, and this did start the ball rolling - though the Seller made the mistake of making promises of delivery that were not kept. It took only a very short while to work out what was going on: the Seller was making the fatal error of stalling because he/she did not have the item in the first place, and an even bigger mistake in thinking that I would go away and forget about it! Cutting the story short, I told eBay and PayPal what I was certain of, they were in the process of dealing with the matter, but, in the meantime the Seller came to his/her senses and put their hands up (after I said the Police would be the next step before the SCC - eBay were very unhappy as the Seller's adds. and tel.no. were out of date). The key with all this when in such situations is to NEVER make threats that cannot or will not be carried forward... if they are said, they must be meant, and one must without being prepared to carry them out. Yes, there is quite a lot of writing to do, and careful thought to make sure that all the correct procedures, Rules, Regs., are taken care of - whether for eBay, PayPal or prep. for the SCC application/execution.
Luckily you had things sorted out in your own way, and it worked very well and you achieved a satisfactory conclusion - with inconvenience granted, but you 'lost little' apart from inconvenience. Think on it this way, not many would have done what you had done, and the Seller chose the wrong person to muck about with when they sold to you!!!
To sum up. Whilst without doubt there are some dodgy Sellers on eBay (as there are anywhere/everywhere), there are a very great many more on eBay who are honest and straight in their dealings... and who will do everything properly to keep their good name/FeedBack (again, I am a buyer only, and have never sold on eBay). Again, FeedBack is important, BUT, granted, it is not of very much use if the Seller has only sold about fifteen or so items (but a clean record is still a good indicator), so at the end of the day a combination of "if-it-sounds-to-good-to-be-true" and 'Caveat Emptor' must apply, and "you pays your money and you takes your chance". It must be remembered on eBay one is dealing in the main with people who do not know anything about the intricacies of selling or the proper way of going about it, and this in itself must cause problems: futhermore, when things do go wrong for them, they don't really know how to deal with it. No excuse really of course, as decency and principal should apply, but some just don't know how this is supposed to work.
So, that's it really, and I hope this will clarify what I meant as I wouldn't like there to be any missunderstanding over what has been said - or indeed what Roger said.
Regards, Bernard