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Author Topic: If all else fails...........  (Read 9273 times)

BarryM

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #25 on: June 02, 2009, 10:53:15 AM »

Given that FLJ only supplies the assembly manual written in Alpha Centaurean and assembling the starship requires an acreage the size of Basingstoke, I imagine he will have emptied his Swiss bank account and retired to his tax haven before Andyn expires from carrot deprivation.

Mind you, submitting a planning application to demolish Basingstoke and build a starship assembly dock does have its good points.  %)
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Martin [Admin]

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #26 on: June 02, 2009, 11:08:32 AM »

One's only a diagram???
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FullLeatherJacket

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #27 on: June 02, 2009, 11:25:34 AM »

I'm encouraged to see that this thread has descended into the chaos I had forseen............. %) The Emperor will be well pleased with this day's work.

Martin
Well spotted! Have a Gold Star to stick on your "Who's a Very Clever Boy?" chart (Free with this week's edition of 'Carrot Strangling for Beginners' Part 1b).

Is Basingstoke in Switzerland, then? And, if not, why  not?

FLJ

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DickyD

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #28 on: June 02, 2009, 11:58:45 AM »

This has got to be the first topic by you boffins that I have ever understood :-))
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FullLeatherJacket

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #29 on: June 02, 2009, 12:20:26 PM »

This has got to be the first topic by you boffins that I have ever understood :-))

Aaaaaaaargh! Back to base sharpish, boys - the Feds have twigged the plot!!
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The long Build

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #30 on: June 02, 2009, 01:12:00 PM »

It's an electronic carrot held in stasis in hyperspace within a black hole. You will need to reach Warp Factor 10 in order to reach it. I believe FLJ can supply the necessary components (in kit form) to achieve this but the cost of assembly may be rather high.

warp factor  10 !! why go so slow when you can use the   Infinite Improbability Drive , thus be every where at the same time.. :}

However this should be used carefuly as

"An earlier attempt at using the improbability drive, Starship Titanic,  In theory, the infinite improbability drive would make it infinitely improbable that anything would go wrong. It was not successful, however, ending in a "Spontaneous Massive Existence Failure." This was because, in these earlier times when the nature of improbability was less well understood, it was not appreciated that any event that is infinitely improbable will, by definition, occur almost immediately." %%

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BarryM

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #31 on: June 02, 2009, 01:32:01 PM »

Hang on, before I put my order into Daddy Bigbucks FLJ, what frequency do a Starship's dilithium crystals operate on?

Barry M

PS Basingstoke is not in Switzerland because the Swiss are neutrals. It's something in the water.  O0
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Martin [Admin]

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #32 on: June 02, 2009, 01:46:56 PM »

Should be something like this?
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malcolmfrary

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #33 on: June 02, 2009, 01:52:53 PM »

Quote
PS Basingstoke is not in Switzerland because the Swiss are neutrals. It's something in the water. 
I thought it was because they have Toblerone, cuckoo clocks and the best manicured fighting forces in history, and they had to draw a line somewhere.
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Martin [Admin]

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #34 on: June 02, 2009, 01:54:48 PM »

BTW FLJ, Just reading back on my Condor 20/2 build, can you tell us a little something about solder
used these days and how it differs from the old multicore lead solder I know and love?

http://www.modelboatmayhem.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=5996.0
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andyn

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #35 on: June 02, 2009, 02:07:28 PM »

No worries people, I found the carrot...

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FullLeatherJacket

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #36 on: June 02, 2009, 02:17:26 PM »

Martin (thank gawd for a sensible question...)

We industrial types are now required By Law to use only lead-free solder, unless it's for repairing a unit which was made with the "old" stuff or for various esoteric purposes like medical research equipment. No doubt the Dept of Silly Rules has a comprehensive and incomprehensible list of permissible uses. The old stuff has a small lead content which allows a lower temperature to be used - typically 270C - while the Pb-Free stuff has none (hence the epithet "lead-free"). It's harder when cool but requires more heat to melt it - I use 300C - and eats away at soldering iron tips a lot faster. I much prefer to use the old stuff because IMHO it gives a neater joint and is easier to work with, but we daren't use it for commercial purposes on pain of Very Nasty Euro-Things happening to us.
 
Our starship kits are four hundred thousand standard Galactic Credits and include ready-scrooned and fottered dilithium crystals. They are best assembled with beef dripping but some users advocate lime marmalade instead, especially on Wednesdays. Just follow the easy-to-follow wiring diagram, not forgetting to take the third left after the lights in Harpenden.

I am reliably informed that lead-free Toblerone is only available in Basingstoke to practising human beings..... Proof of postcode may be required, too.

Darth Vaguer
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dreadnought72

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #37 on: June 02, 2009, 02:45:19 PM »

No worries people, I found the carrot...



Sorry Andy - but I've seen The Matrix. There is no carrot. There is only yourself.  %%

Andy
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BarryM

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #38 on: June 02, 2009, 02:53:27 PM »

It's nae guid, Cap'n, that carrot canna take it any longer; it's about to explode and blow us all across the known Universe and Basingstoke. Beam me up, the noo!!!

Scotty McScott

(Dilithium crystal polisher and fluent in Hollywood Scots)
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Martin [Admin]

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #39 on: June 02, 2009, 02:59:00 PM »

...... I think the unexpected good weather is getting to some people...!  %%
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andyn

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #40 on: June 02, 2009, 03:01:26 PM »

...... I think the unexpected good weather is getting to some people...!  %%

Must be the heat...
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Circlip

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #41 on: June 02, 2009, 04:03:48 PM »

So if someone had a few reels of the "Old Stuff" would their fortunes be made to be able to retire in semi - poverty as opposed to abject poverty???  :embarrassed:

  Regards  Ian
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barriew

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #42 on: June 02, 2009, 04:24:40 PM »

So if someone had a few reels of the "Old Stuff" would their fortunes be made to be able to retire in semi - poverty as opposed to abject poverty???  :embarrassed:

  Regards  Ian

No - because you can only sell it to us oldies, and we have no money either {-)

Barrie
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Circlip

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #43 on: June 02, 2009, 04:29:31 PM »

OH  Bum  :((
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andrewh

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #44 on: June 02, 2009, 05:03:18 PM »

The old stuff is still readily available from a supplier who advertises in one of the comics - FLJ was very precise about what he said about lead-free solder.  I will see if i can find the web site

I find the new and improved A) needs 400deg C or more at the iron
B) has more surface tension or is less fluid than the old stuff - so it makes unsightly blobbles rather than wetting and flowing

andrew

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Bill D203

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #45 on: June 02, 2009, 07:18:12 PM »

As an Electrical engineer and part time Sound engineer I have had no probs with the new type solder. I am nearing the end of my second roll and every joint has been fine. We will all get the hang of the new stuff just the same as we got used to not having leaded petrol at the pumps.
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red181

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #46 on: June 02, 2009, 07:28:41 PM »

did Proteus not answer the question right at the beginning, pray tell FLJ, if that was the correct answer, what prize will he get???? and why have subsequent "same" answers been awarded the gold star!, dont tell me? Its an mmb motor! or one of those "p" action controller thingys that are all the rage right now:}

Did the person who asked for the help realise he was going to be the victim of this thread? >>:-(
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OMK

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #47 on: June 02, 2009, 07:37:38 PM »

"We will all get the hang of the new stuff just the same as we got used to not having leaded petrol at the pumps.".

Good point. But the main difference 'tween unleaded fuel and unleaded solder is that unleaded fuel is, without argument, better for the environment, whereas unleaded solder wil never be as good as as the leaded variety. Electrical engineers such as yourself, and the one-man-band play-at-home types are hardly having any detrimental effect upon the enviro'.
Speaking on a personal level I know I shall have a damn good cry when mine is all gone.
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Bill D203

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #48 on: June 02, 2009, 07:53:59 PM »

"We will all get the hang of the new stuff just the same as we got used to not having leaded petrol at the pumps.".

Good point. But the main difference 'tween unleaded fuel and unleaded solder is that unleaded fuel is, without argument, better for the environment, whereas unleaded solder Will never be as good as as the leaded variety. Electrical engineers such as yourself, and the one-man-band play-at-home types are hardly having any detrimental effect upon the enviro'.
Speaking on a personal level I know I shall have a damn good cry when mine is all gone.
You will be fine. The change over is not as bad as most make it out to be. Clean the tip of the Iron and you can't go far wrong. Yes us small time users are not causing a global problem but manufactures of solder have a bigger customer base to worry about.
I think they worry that folks that use it are going to chew it and get leaded !!!
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FullLeatherJacket

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Re: If all else fails...........
« Reply #49 on: June 02, 2009, 08:10:02 PM »

did Proteus not answer the question right at the beginning, pray tell FLJ
Yep
if that was the correct answer, what prize will he get????
A carrot
and why have subsequent "same" answers been awarded the gold star!
They're my  stars and I'll give them to who I like, so there.....
dont tell me? Its an mmb motor! or one of those "p" action controller thingys that are all the rage right now:}
OK - I won't tell you.
Did the person who asked for the help realise he was going to be the victim of this thread? >>:-(
Probably not - we don't usually consult our legal representatives before we converse, but he has a keenly developed sense of fun and can recognise a leg-pull when he sees one.

It's just a bit of fun, sir; nothing more.

FLJ
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