An old seadog hobbles into his local inn and orders a drink, geez what happened to your leg Mick? asks the barman, we got hit broadside and it got blown off by a canonball said Mick, but I’m ok now I have this wooden one.
Next visit to the inn the barman notices Mick has a false arm with a hook, blimey Mick what happenend to your arm? he asks, lost it in a sword fight boarding a pirate ship Mick replied, but I’m ok now I’ve got this one.
A later visit and Mick's wearing a patch over his eye, hells bells Mick what happened to your eye? asks the barman, lost it Mick replied, was out on watch and as I looked up over yardarm a gull s**t in my eye, you lost your eye because a gull s**t in it? asked the barman in amazement, yeah said Mick .................. forgot about the hook!