Model Boat Mayhem

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length.
Pages: 1 2 3 [4]   Go Down

Author Topic: British citizenship test  (Read 14928 times)

derekwarner

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 9,464
  • Location: Wollongong Australia
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #75 on: July 10, 2010, 01:07:08 am »

sorry....... ok2 a little off track = learning to speak English {:-{

My sister in-law... Dr G Warner %% is a Dean of a private college in Sydney ....they have hundreds of students from the United Emirates & Asia over here in OZ on student visas just to learn the English language

At my local UOW [University of Wollongong 26,000 students] we have just under six thousand students from similar backgrounds just studying the English language

http://www.google.com.au/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=6&ved=0CDEQFjAF&url=http%3A%2F%2Fstudylink.com%2Fdisplay%2Fprovider%2Fprovider-info.html%3Fpid%3Dpid-mm-01-00102e&ei=4Lk3TNyGEM-TkAX64MW4Aw&usg=AFQjCNHssmIbZItV3sN0CFoS6se9grT5hg


Total number of students: 26,000

Number of International students: 6,000

Percentage of International students: 25%

International to domestic ratio: 25%

Main countries of origin: Bangladesh, Canada, China, France, Hong Kong, India, Indonesia, Japan, Korea, Malaysia, Pakistan, Singapore, Taiwan, Thailand, United Arab Emirates, and USA


Australia wide  :o :o :o...teaching others a new language is a thriving industry with big $ fees charged............Derek
Logged
Derek Warner

Honorary Secretary [Retired]
Illawarra Live Steamers Co-op
Australia
www.ils.org.au

RaaArtyGunner

  • Guest
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #76 on: July 10, 2010, 01:19:43 am »



But I do believe that any migrant to any country should be able to speak the language and be able to have enough knowledge of things like customs and basic history about the country that they are going to call home before becoming a citizen.

Regards David

Goodness me that is radical thinking going back to the past %)
There was a time in a land Farway called Oz where future settlers/immigrant/migrants learnt the language and customs and became naturalised Aussies.  O0 :-))

But "enlightenment" prevailed and now thay no speaka or unna stan da language or wanna be Ausssies  <:( >>:-( >>:-( <*< <*<
Logged

derekwarner

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 9,464
  • Location: Wollongong Australia
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #77 on: July 10, 2010, 01:46:23 am »

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm now I not being cynical   O0 O0...but it appears that many of the international students on completion of their English studies....apply for an extension to their student visas to undertake additional university enrolment

Naturally one of the criteria of the student visa extension is that the applicant must be able to demonstrate an acceptable knowledge & use of the English language  O0

Politicians  %% :o argue....that teaching English to international students is infinate as a renewable commodity is far better than selling our coal & iron ore which is finite........just sometimes I must agree with certain DINGBAT politicial theory ..........Derek %)
Logged
Derek Warner

Honorary Secretary [Retired]
Illawarra Live Steamers Co-op
Australia
www.ils.org.au

kiwi96

  • Guest
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #78 on: July 10, 2010, 05:23:22 am »

I got 50%. Mind you not interested in coming over as wife is from there and does not want to retun, nor do the ex pats we have for friends. Some very irrelevant questions I thought for a questioneer on UK citizinship application.
Logged

dodgy geezer

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 3,948
  • Location: London
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #79 on: July 10, 2010, 09:07:57 am »


Goodness me that is radical thinking going back to the past %)
There was a time in a land Farway called Oz where future settlers/immigrant/migrants learnt the language and customs and became naturalised Aussies. 


I'm impressed! I didn't think all the convicts were taught tribal customs and languages....
Logged

RaaArtyGunner

  • Guest
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #80 on: July 10, 2010, 11:20:07 am »


Dodgy,
We sent Rolf Harris over with the song " Tie Me Kangaroo down sport"  O0 to let you know how we had progressed and I think he (on our behalf  %) ;) ) was knighted. O0
Logged

Perkasaman2

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Online Online
  • Posts: 943
  • Model Boat Mayhem is Great!
  • Location: North East
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #81 on: July 10, 2010, 01:06:33 pm »

On behalf of the log-blowers and board- benders in our kingdom, can I express our  deepest gratitude to this talented alien.  :}
(I think he should have got a peerage  %) )

 He's definately up there with Dame Edna. {-)
Logged

dodgy geezer

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 3,948
  • Location: London
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #82 on: July 10, 2010, 03:54:43 pm »

http://sirlespatterson.com/media/parkinson/

Just run the video. If only to hear the introduction.....
Logged

RaaArtyGunner

  • Guest
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #83 on: July 10, 2010, 10:57:45 pm »

http://sirlespatterson.com/media/parkinson/

Just run the video. If only to hear the introduction.....

Dodgy,
What can I say,
 :-))  {-) {-) {-) {-) {-) %% %% %% %%
Aussie aussie Oi Oi Oi
Logged

rem2007

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 776
  • Location: Northumberland
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #84 on: July 10, 2010, 11:14:18 pm »

sorry....... ok2 a little off track = learning to speak English {:-{

My sister in-law... Dr G Warner %% is a Dean of a private college in Sydney ....they have hundreds of students from the United Emirates & Asia over here in OZ on student visas just to learn the English language

At my local UOW [University of Wollongong 26,000 students] we have just under six thousand students from similar backgrounds just studying the English language

http://www.google.com.au/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=6&ved=0CDEQFjAF&url=http%3A%2F%2Fstudylink.com%2Fdisplay%2Fprovider%2Fprovider-info.html%3Fpid%3Dpid-mm-01-00102e&ei=4Lk3TNyGEM-TkAX64MW4Aw&usg=AFQjCNHssmIbZItV3sN0CFoS6se9grT5hg


Total number of students: 26,000

Number of International students: 6,000

Percentage of International students: 25%

International to domestic ratio: 25%

Main countries of origin: Bangladesh, Canada, China, France, Hong Kong, India, Indonesia, Japan, Korea, Malaysia, Pakistan, Singapore, Taiwan, Thailand, United Arab Emirates, and USA


Australia wide  :o :o :o...teaching others a new language is a thriving industry with big $ fees charged............Derek


I'm just curious as to why a Canadian would go to Austrailia to leartn English? {-) Sort of reminds me of something I was asked 6 years ago when I moved to the Uk, Do they speak the same English in Canada as we do here in England?
Well, I replied, we are a bilingual nation so, >:-o
Logged

derekwarner

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 9,464
  • Location: Wollongong Australia
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #85 on: July 10, 2010, 11:17:09 pm »

mmmmm I have seen Sir Les ....our OZ "culturile attachete" perform @ a club venue some years back.....absolutely side splitting & the vulgarity >>:-( is so pointed & yet not offensive  {-) O0 :embarrassed: ...some would say a very talented artisittee  .......Derek
Logged
Derek Warner

Honorary Secretary [Retired]
Illawarra Live Steamers Co-op
Australia
www.ils.org.au

Perkasaman2

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Online Online
  • Posts: 943
  • Model Boat Mayhem is Great!
  • Location: North East
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #86 on: July 11, 2010, 11:58:24 am »

we share a great sense of humour.  O0 {-)
Logged

dodgy geezer

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 3,948
  • Location: London
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #87 on: July 11, 2010, 01:16:50 pm »

I think that all are in agreement that the 'British citizenship' tests are a complete load of less than satisfactory.

It is a given, of course, that the whole concept of trying to define the culture of any country by means of a multiple choice questionnaire is perilously close to clinical insanity, and the sort of weird notion that would only occur to an academic sociologist living in north-west London who has never been further north than Oxford - the very people who seemed to have been running much of the last administration's home policy. 

On second thoughts, however, one of the enduring qualities of some inhabitants of these Isles (particularly the English) has always been a strong tendency towards eccentricity - so perhaps anyone who takes the test, throws down their pen in incredulity and exclaims 'These people are mad! has moved some way towards understanding us....

Given that some contract company has surely been paid a lot of money for producing these questions, I wonder if the assembled and motley crew here can do better? I am reminded of that famous bit of Hofnung advice to foreigners - describing British culture he gave some examples, if memory serves:

- Never pay the price demanded for a newspaper; good-natured haggling is customary.

- Never attempt to tip a taxi-driver.

- On first entering a railway carriage, it is customary to shake hands with every passenger.

- Try the famous echo in the British Museum Reading Room.

- Visitors in London hotels are expected by the management to hang the bedlinen out of the windows to air.

- Parking is permitted in the grounds of Buckingham Palace on payment of a small fee to the sentry.

- You can identify British brothels because they have a blue lamp outside.

- British licensing laws require pubs to clear old stock at the end of each day, so beer is free in London pubs after the evening bell.




Logged

Double D

  • Guest
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #88 on: July 12, 2010, 10:40:05 pm »



I failed <:(  Don't tell my bosses though, I have worked for the Local Council for the last 25 years and this shows I've still got a lot to learn O0
Logged

Number 6

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1,263
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #89 on: July 13, 2010, 02:00:11 pm »

Failed, what a stupid and pointless test!!! ;D ;D ;D
Logged

RaaArtyGunner

  • Guest
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #90 on: July 14, 2010, 12:16:02 am »


Don't worry  <:( it's OK  %)  you can always sit for ours  :-))
Logged

derekwarner

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 9,464
  • Location: Wollongong Australia
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #91 on: July 14, 2010, 01:12:11 am »

Now that's very sporting of you RaaArtyGunner ...to offer a POM a ticket to OZ  >>:-( if he/she passes the test

I seem to have lost my copy of the OZ Citezenshipe de-teste some time after little Johhy Howard lost office

Do you have a copy of the version by previous Revin07 or the current RED head Jilley? that you could post here?


 :} %) :-X ....Derek
Logged
Derek Warner

Honorary Secretary [Retired]
Illawarra Live Steamers Co-op
Australia
www.ils.org.au

RaaArtyGunner

  • Guest
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #92 on: July 14, 2010, 02:04:39 am »


Derek,
Don't stress she's allright  :-)) the test will be like cricket tests  O0 {-) %% <*<
Logged

derekwarner

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 9,464
  • Location: Wollongong Australia
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #93 on: July 14, 2010, 02:56:39 am »

Moderators ...I have only watched 3/4 of this .....so if there is any swearing I no not what ....... {-) - Derek

WARNING - do not open the following link to the Australian Citizenship Test - there is a naughty swear word near the end which must NOT be heard on MAYHEM  %%

For those who need to see the test, please copy the link to your own PC & view & laugh via that medium.......

YOU have been warned TWICE.........again do not open the following link to the Australian Citizenship Test - there is a naughty swear word near the end which must NOT be heard on MAYHEM


http://www.google.com.au/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=5&ved=0CDYQtwIwBA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DGb4LoTG3C8E&ei=7Rc9TPblBoXEvQPHqKjsDg&usg=AFQjCNH-XJM5FTiWqGB0Vitm-MBqb8Tcsg
Logged
Derek Warner

Honorary Secretary [Retired]
Illawarra Live Steamers Co-op
Australia
www.ils.org.au

RaaArtyGunner

  • Guest
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #94 on: July 16, 2010, 12:56:23 am »


Rumour has it  ;)  ;) that the "Australian Citizenship Testing Authority"  {-) has been infiltrated  :embarrassed: :embarrassed: and the following information  %) :o has been offered for sale  :-))  on the Brit blackmarket  >>:-( <*< <:(
Logged

djrobbo

  • Guest
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #95 on: July 16, 2010, 07:29:57 pm »

Oh dear...36%.....i cant be british afterall.......have to look for a cheap ticket out of here then..


             CAN THE LAST PERSON TO LEAVE THE COUNTRY PLEASE TURN THE LIGHTS OFF   !!!!!!!!
Logged

RaaArtyGunner

  • Guest
Re: British citizenship test
« Reply #96 on: July 18, 2010, 06:05:45 am »


Sruth, looks like all who failed the test are heading down under  O0  O0

 Bris Vegas or little Brit-bane?
KATHERINE FEENEY
July 17, 2010

     

Brisbane may be colloquially known as Bris Vegas, but it seems Brit-bane may be more appropriate.

But despite the British influx, there may not be a need to stop chilling our beers just yet.

A NatWest survey published last week reported British ex-pats accounted for 10.4 per cent of the city's population.

That flew in the face of Australian Bureau of Statistics figures, collected during the 2006 national census, which found just 4.5 per cent of Brisbane residents were British.

A further 0.7 per cent spoke with a distinct Scottish brogue.

Whatever the true figure, it accounted for a significant portion of the population born on the British isles.

British expatriate Adrian Davies said Queensland's capital is a lucrative destination for those relocating from the Old Dart.

Co-organiser of the Brisbane Everton Football Club supporters group and ready to cheer on his team at Suncorp Stadium tonight, Mr Davies first visited Australia in 1990.

It didn't take long for him to become enamoured with the weather and lifestyle offered here and he moved from England 14 years ago, settling in Brisbane with his Queensland-born wife.

Mr Davies said he would never go back.

“Brisbane offers you a laid back lifestyle,” he said.

“It's a great place to raise a family – the climate and the access to schools and health.

“I always tell the family back home that the lifestyle is better here.” {-) {-) {-)

His responsibilities to the club and involvement with the greater football community kept him in touch with many fellow British and European expatriates and Mr Davies said there was a general consensus among them that life was better in Brisbane.

He said most British people prefer the economic climate in Australia to that in the United Kingdom where, Mr Davies said, the Global Financial Crisis had led to widespread housing and employment problems.

Brisbane Marketing CEO John Aitken recently told the BBC a collaborative business style prompted many new recruits, who in turn stimulated the city's social scene.

"This rapid growth has delivered new entertainment precincts, an exciting live music scene and quaint urban villages … with a beautiful river, natural bay and scenic rim at our doorstep,” he said.

Lord Mayor Campbell Newman said he could also understand why Brisbane was appealing to British expats.

"Brisbane is a youthful, vibrant and progressive city and a place of great beauty with stunning natural features," he said. 8) 8)

"So, needless to say, I'm not surprised that Brisbane is the city of choice for British expats.”  :-)) :-))

The NatWest study also reported that in 2008, 17.9 per cent of Australian immigrants - 30,590 people - were Britons.

State-based figures from the Department of Immigration and Citizenship showed New Zealand was the main contributor of new international arrivals to Queensland, followed by migrants from the United Kingdom and South Africa.  <:( <:( <*< <*< >>:-( >>:-( >>:-(
Logged
Pages: 1 2 3 [4]   Go Up
 

Page created in 0.098 seconds with 21 queries.