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Author Topic: EU Madness  (Read 843 times)

essex2visuvesi

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EU Madness
« on: March 11, 2011, 05:40:47 am »

> >A farmer named Bill was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous
> pasture
> >in Scotland
> when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a
>
> >cloud of dust..
>
> >
>
> >The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan
> sunglasses and
>
> >YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the farmer, "If I tell you
> exactly
>
> >how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a
> calf?"
>
> >
>
> >Bill looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his
> peacefully
>
> >grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?"
>
> >
>
> >The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,
> connects it
>
> >to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the
>
> >Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on
> his
>
> >location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the
> area
>
> >in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
>
> >
>
> >The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and
> exports it
>
> >to an image processing facility in Hamburg .
>
> >
>
> >Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image
> has
>
> >been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL
> database
>
> >through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his
> Blackberry
>
> >and, after a few minutes, receives a response.
>
> >
>
> >Finally, he prints out a full-colour, 150-page report on his hi-tech,
>
> >miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the farmer and says, "You
> have
>
> >exactly 1,586 cows and calves."
>
> >
>
> >"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says
> Bill.
>
> >
>
> >He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with
>
> >amusement as the young man stuffs it into the boot of his car.
>
> >
>
> >Then Bill says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what
> your
>
> >business is, will you give me back my calf?"
>
> >
>
> >The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why
> not?"
>
> >
>
> >"You're a Member of the European Parliament", says Bill.
>
> >
>
> >"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"
>
> >
>
> >"No guessing required." answered the farmer. "You showed up here even
> though
>
> >nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew,
> to a
>
> >question I never asked. You used millions of pounds worth of
> equipment
>
> >trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know
> a
>
> >thing about how working people make a living - or about cows, for
> that
>
> >matter. This is a flock of sheep...
>
> >
>
> >Now give me back my dog.
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Netleyned

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    • cleethorpes mba
Re: EU Madness
« Reply #1 on: March 11, 2011, 06:36:05 am »

 {-) {-) {-) {-) {-) {-) :-)) :-)) :-)) :-))

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richtea

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Re: EU Madness
« Reply #2 on: March 11, 2011, 10:45:48 pm »

Funny, but sounds about right.  :-))
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