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Author Topic: DAFTLAND UK  (Read 3830 times)

DickyD

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DAFTLAND UK
« on: August 26, 2011, 12:45:46 AM »

Britain is changing its name: we are going to be known as “Daftland.”


We live in a country called Daftland
The Britain we knew is no more
Where sensible people do ludicrous things
Or risk breaking some Daftland law.
In Daftland we've police dogs with muzzles
Less the villain has cause to complain
And to steal from a shop and say 'sorry'
Means you're free with no stain to your name.

You had better leave lights on in buildings
When you lock up and go home at night
'cause the burglars might hurt themselves entering
And there's no way you'll be in the right.
When speaking be wary in Daftland
As some terms that you've used all your life
Now have connotations unintended
And you'll end up in all sorts of strife.

We elect politicians in Daftland
to give us the laws of the land
Yet eight laws in ten now come from abroad
The whole thing has got out of hand.
The borders are open in Daftland
And of migrants there's no keeping track
Just a few of the thousands illegally here
Will ever be caught and sent back.

The exception to this is the hero
Who fought for this land in the war
He's old and he's sick, he might cost us a bit
So he's not welcome here any more.
When the history is written of Daftland
Historians may just recall
That the craziest people in Daftland
We're the public who put up with it all.


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Richard Solent Radio Controlled Model Boat Club http://www.srcmbc.org.uk

w3bby

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #1 on: August 26, 2011, 07:18:52 AM »

So the UK has finally overtaken Sweden then %% %%

derekwarner

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #2 on: August 26, 2011, 07:31:11 AM »

Very good Richard.... {-) I think that both you and our OZ raartygunner have recently been studying by correspondence classes :-)) :}  O0 .....Derk
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JB

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #3 on: August 26, 2011, 08:56:40 AM »

Thanks for that its made my morning!

Hope you don't mind...a hard copy is now in circulation at the ye local shoppe/post office/off licence, I talk to the owner who was pleased to have a read!

The penultimate paragraph has a certain sting to it...

JB.
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nhp651

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #4 on: August 26, 2011, 10:17:13 AM »

great one richard, I shall certainly circulate that one.

think the only ones who actually don't believe or want to believe all you have said are the polititions................ whoi have their heads so far into the ground that they can't even hear never mind see what's going on in the country of ours.

"rip em off britain" has never been so rip em off.........especially when supposedly being in a "common market" european union our kids can go to Holland for a 3 year university course for 4k as opposed to our now outrageous charges of 29,000 and if they work part time they get their accomodation subsidised greatly.

We are no longer a great power and country.....we are, sadly a third rate island living beyond our capacity and capability.

Last one out give yer passport to some illegal please so that they can rob you blind. >>:-( >>:-( >>:-( >>:-( >>:-( >>:-( >>:-( >>:-(
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riggers24

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #5 on: August 26, 2011, 08:13:47 PM »

like it
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Jonty

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #6 on: August 26, 2011, 11:29:50 PM »

THE SECRET PEOPLE

     Smile at us, pay us, pass us; but do not quite forget.
     For we are the people of England, that never has spoken yet.
     There is many a fat farmer that drinks less cheerfully,
     There is many a free French peasant who is richer and sadder than we.
     There are no folk in the whole world so helpless or so wise.
     There is hunger in our bellies, there is laughter in our eyes;
     You laugh at us and love us, both mugs and eyes are wet:
     Only you do not know us. For we have not spoken yet.

Well worth readiing, marking, learning, and inwardly digesting the rest of Chesterton's wonderful poem.
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tt1

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #7 on: August 27, 2011, 01:43:10 AM »

 Another little gem Rich'  :-)) :-))
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Hillyard

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #8 on: August 27, 2011, 07:02:52 PM »

great one richard, I shall certainly circulate that one.

think the only ones who actually don't believe or want to believe all you have said are the polititions................ whoi have their heads so far into the ground that they can't even hear never mind see what's going on in the country of ours.

"rip em off britain" has never been so rip em off.........especially when supposedly being in a "common market" european union our kids can go to Holland for a 3 year university course for 4k as opposed to our now outrageous charges of 29,000 and if they work part time they get their accomodation subsidised greatly.

We are no longer a great power and country.....we are, sadly a third rate island living beyond our capacity and capability.

Last one out give yer passport to some illegal please so that they can rob you blind. >>:-( >>:-( >>:-( >>:-( >>:-( >>:-( >>:-( >>:-(
Like what England did to the world when they were Empire building,especially to Scotland,during the Highland clearances,what goes around,comes around
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wullie/mk2

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #9 on: August 27, 2011, 07:10:30 PM »

Never a truer word said Hillyard,I wish I,d wrote that, :-)) :-)) :-))
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tt1

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #10 on: August 27, 2011, 07:23:47 PM »

Spot on!!
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Colin Bishop

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #11 on: August 27, 2011, 07:31:30 PM »

I wondered how long it would take until we had the onslaught of the chippy Scots.  {:-{

Just a matter of time really.....
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dave301bounty

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #12 on: August 27, 2011, 08:25:12 PM »

I wondered how long it would take until we had the onslaught of the chippy Scots.  {:-{

Just a matter of time really.....Yes ,  a Scot ?   no way.
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nhp651

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #13 on: August 27, 2011, 08:59:15 PM »

it's gettin' windy  and rainy up there at the mo................must be playing havoc with their kilts and making 'em grumpy {-) {-) {-) {-) {-) {-)
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Hillyard

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #14 on: August 27, 2011, 09:32:57 PM »

I wondered how long it would take until we had the onslaught of the chippy Scots.  {:-{

Just a matter of time really.....
Whey man haddaway wi ye a happen to be Geordie .....Geordie first English second   >>:-( %% O0
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Colin Bishop

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #15 on: August 27, 2011, 09:48:47 PM »

Tribalism!

A man should be judged by what he is rather than where he comes from!  ok2

Colin
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pugwash

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #16 on: August 27, 2011, 10:57:37 PM »

Hillyard - what a load of tosh about the Highland Clearances - check your history and you will find the worst landlords during
the Clearances were actually the Clan Chiefs and the SCOTTISH Duchess of Sutherland.  A lot of them employed
Lowland or English  Factors to carry out their dirty work but it was mainly the Scots who benefitted.

Geoff
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tt1

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #17 on: August 28, 2011, 01:00:19 AM »

Ooops! just for clarity -  ' spot on' was in agreement with nhp651's quote!
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Nordsee

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Re: DAFTLAND UK
« Reply #18 on: September 08, 2011, 04:20:40 PM »

Hillyard - what a load of tosh about the Highland Clearances - check your history and you will find the worst landlords during
the Clearances were actually the Clan Chiefs and the SCOTTISH Duchess of Sutherland.  A lot of them employed
Lowland or English  Factors to carry out their dirty work but it was mainly the Scots who benefitted.

Geoff
Also in the last Battle, the one in 1745 when Bonny Prince Charlie and his Mob had their backsides kicked and he scuttled back to France where he belonged, the  " English" army that defeated him was made up  with over 40% Scottish Clansmen who didn't want to be Catholic!
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