Model Boat Mayhem

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Author Topic: Jokes & Humour - 2016  (Read 256901 times)

NFMike

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2016
« Reply #625 on: December 10, 2016, 09:25:32 pm »



...
"How," said the Aussie.
"Scrambled," said the Chief.


Another LOL  :-))

Nemo

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2016
« Reply #626 on: December 14, 2016, 12:23:03 pm »

 :D
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RAAArtyGunner

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2016
« Reply #627 on: December 14, 2016, 08:45:29 pm »

.
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Gunna build those other boats one day.

Nemo

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2016
« Reply #628 on: December 15, 2016, 03:31:51 pm »

 :-))
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Nemo

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2016
« Reply #629 on: December 16, 2016, 08:34:32 pm »

 :o
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Nemo

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2016
« Reply #630 on: December 21, 2016, 08:25:51 pm »

Stumpy and his wife Martha went to the State Fair every year.

Every year Stumpy would say, "Martha, I'd like to ride in that there airplane." And every year Martha would say, "I know, Stumpy, but that airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars."

This one year Stumpy and Martha went to the fair and Stumpy said, "Martha, I'm 71 years old. If I don't ride that airplane this year I may never get another chance. " Martha replied, "Stumpy, that there airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars."

The pilot overheard them arguing and said, "Folks, I'll make you a deal. I'll take you both up for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say one word, I won't charge you, but if you say one word it's ten dollars."

Stumpy and Martha agreed and up they go.

The pilot does all kinds of twists and turns, rolls and dives, but not a word is heard. He does all his tricks over a gain, but still not a word.

They land and the pilot turns to Stumpy, "By golly, I did everything I could think of to get you to yell out, but you didn't."

Stumpy replied, "Well, I was gonna say something when Martha fell out, but ten dollars is ten dollars."
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Nemo

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2016
« Reply #631 on: December 23, 2016, 01:12:22 pm »

Fred Smith is on his deathbed and knows the end is near.  His nurse, his wife, his daughter and 2 sons, are with him.
He asks for 2 witnesses to be present and a camcorder be in place to record his last wishes, and when all is ready he begins to speak:
"My son, Bernie, I want you to take the Mayfair houses."
"My daughter Sybil, you take the apartments over in the West end.”
"My son, Jamie, I want you to take the offices over in the City Centre."
"Sarah, my dear wife, please take all the residential buildings on the banks of the river.”
The nurse and witnesses are blown away as they did not realize his extensive holdings, and as Doug slips away, the nurse says, "Mrs. Smith, your husband must have been such a hard-working man to have
accumulated all this property”.
 
The wife sighs deeply and replies, "He was a newsagent and those were his delivery rounds!'
 
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Nemo

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2016
« Reply #632 on: December 31, 2016, 10:06:58 pm »

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