Topic: Ice cream - or should that be I scream? (Read 10614 times)

meechingman · « **on:** July 20, 2015, 06:26:45 pm »

A lorry from Walls has collided with a lorry from Lyons Maid on the M1 and the carriageway is covered in ten tons of ice cream. A Police spokesman said that they're doing their best to deal with the incident but have simply run out of cones.

Netleyned · « **Reply #1 on:** July 20, 2015, 06:36:01 pm »

I Askey the question
Why didn't they order more

Ned

jaymac · « **Reply #2 on:** July 20, 2015, 07:09:05 pm »

Did anyone just dial 99

sparkey · « **Reply #3 on:** July 20, 2015, 07:28:57 pm »

I nearly crashed into them but luckily I missed it by a wafer.

morley bill 1 · « **Reply #4 on:** July 20, 2015, 10:03:43 pm »

I would have stopped and helped but had just had my breakfast.....Bill.........

Martin (Admin) · « **Reply #5 on:** July 20, 2015, 10:05:18 pm »

Quote from: jaymac on July 20, 2015, 07:09:05 pm

Did anyone just dial 99

Nemo · « **Reply #6 on:** July 20, 2015, 10:14:36 pm »

By a strange co-incidence, one driver was called Ben and the other Jerry!

Nemo · « **Reply #7 on:** July 20, 2015, 10:18:59 pm »

Ben was found lying on the floor of his lorry covered with chocolate sauce. Police say that he topped himself.

Nemo · « **Reply #8 on:** July 20, 2015, 10:20:32 pm »

Jerry could not face a court case so he shot himself with a Magnum.

Nemo · « **Reply #9 on:** July 20, 2015, 10:24:13 pm »

A local reporter who came on the scene said it was the biggest scoop of his career!

radiojoe · « **Reply #10 on:** July 20, 2015, 10:40:23 pm »

The police hope to have the roads cleared by Sundae

CGAux26 · « **Reply #11 on:** July 21, 2015, 12:54:42 am »

You scream
I scream
We all scream for ice cream

Or fewer ice cream jokes.

jaymac · « **Reply #12 on:** July 21, 2015, 09:54:30 am »

or Chris Barber's Ice scream you scream everybody loves ice scream how many remember those days

Dannypenguin · « **Reply #13 on:** July 21, 2015, 01:41:03 pm »

How a journalist would report the above:

"Well Ladies and Gents, this is one of the biggest scoops of my career - a Walls and Lyons Maid lorry collided this morning on the M1, ten tons of ice cream cover the road. The police have run out of Cones so unable to seal off the incident, and people are Askey why more weren't ordered. One gentleman said to me he missed the collision by a Wafer however dialed 99 straight after - and he also reported that one of the two drivers, which we believe are called Ben and Jerry, was found on the floor covered in Chocolate sauce leading to reports that he Topped himself with a Magnum. At the moment the emergency services are saying the road might be open by Sundae."

dougal99 · « **Reply #14 on:** July 21, 2015, 04:59:27 pm »

All this has given me a headache

Maybe I shouldn't have read it so fast

Colin Bishop · « **Reply #15 on:** July 21, 2015, 05:03:47 pm »

More cones were not ordered as, due to cuts, the police don't have enough lolly....

Netleyned · « **Reply #16 on:** July 21, 2015, 05:07:57 pm »

They could have had a whippy round

Ned

meechingman · « **Reply #17 on:** July 21, 2015, 05:11:16 pm »

O_M_G, what did I start........

sparkey · « **Reply #18 on:** July 21, 2015, 05:32:38 pm »

You never know where it is going that's the fun of it,some threads on here start quite innocent and go on and on and on.............Ray.

ballastanksian · « **Reply #19 on:** July 21, 2015, 09:18:19 pm »

Quote from: sparkey on July 21, 2015, 05:32:38 pm

You never know where it is going that's the fun of it,some threads on here start quite innocent and go on and on and on.............Ray.

'Innocent' do not use ice cream in their drinks, just battered fruit :O)

Nemo · « **Reply #20 on:** July 21, 2015, 10:33:36 pm »

NEWSFLASH! Reports are coming in that 3 fresh witnesses to this incident have come forward - a Mr Whippy, a Neapolitan and his passengers Mr A. Knickerbocker and his wife Glory. Their somewhat confused version contains mention of a Banana being the cause of the incident but their opinions are Split.

It was further reported that the M1 has never before attracted so many spectators at it's many accidents - they came in their hundreds and thousands and this one topped the lot.

ballastanksian · « **Reply #21 on:** July 21, 2015, 10:58:21 pm »

Reports state that at least one of the drivers was a bit of a flake

warspite · « **Reply #22 on:** July 22, 2015, 03:29:27 pm »

Reports are coming in the police have finally managed to cornetto the area off, i'd get me coat but i'm already wearing it.

Nemo · « **Reply #23 on:** July 24, 2015, 02:18:19 pm »

Meechingman - your joke was a real ice-breaker!

ballastanksian · « **Reply #24 on:** July 24, 2015, 08:18:44 pm »

I wonder if this is a world pun record?

Probably not.

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Author Topic: Ice cream - or should that be I scream? (Read 10614 times)