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Author Topic: Things you do not want to hear  (Read 7336 times)

david48

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Things you do not want to hear
« on: October 12, 2015, 11:37:51 am »

(Sunday night @ 10:30) Why is the carpet wet here ,Ohh look at the ceiling what will that be .
David .
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Davenotdone

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #1 on: October 12, 2015, 11:58:32 am »

Wife in bed.............' Dave, why is my face wet????? '      me.............' flat roofs gone again i think :((


                       Regards, Dave.
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Davenotdone

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #2 on: October 12, 2015, 12:02:52 pm »

My wife in the kitchen...............' Dave, why does the kitchen smell funny????'     me..........'i'll take a look ( found out the dish washer waste pipe had a small hole in it thus discharging waste water behind the units instead of to the drain :((

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Davenotdone

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #3 on: October 12, 2015, 12:06:33 pm »

Wife in kitchen................'Dave,  why are the kitchen work tops wet??????       me...........took a look at the ceiling and realised it was directly beneath the shower which somebody has just used who didn't  understand why they were stood in three inches of water and that the shower waste was blocked {:-{
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Capt Podge

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #4 on: October 12, 2015, 12:12:16 pm »

SWMBO.  {-)   (unless it's mealtime or a brew on the go O0 )
 
Regards,
 
Ray.
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david48

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #5 on: October 12, 2015, 12:31:01 pm »

Today ,reason for why is this carpet wet ,cold tap joint failed ,we have been away 2 days at the Scotish boat show , looks as it might want new tap remade joint 3 times could be tap body is cracked , more investigation required .
David
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mermod

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #6 on: October 12, 2015, 12:53:38 pm »

The other week.......Dad, why is there water coming out under the bathroom door? I run up the hallway and fling the door open to a bathroom full of steam, check shower,nothing, check vanity taps, nothing, notice steaming hot water coming out from under vanity (when it had cleared enough to see) dive hand into cupboard feeling for regulation stop taps, no taps, panicking, runs out to the main only to discover that the main and it's cover that were updated recently by the council have changed and you need a screwdriver to lift the cover, run to shed to find screwdriver, run back, lift lid, no bloody tap, instead the new mains have an obscure lever underneath so you have to fumble around in the mud,frogs and spiders to locate it, water now off and hand starting to sting from diving it into a cupboard of hot steaming water, check's back inside vanity to find a broken flexi cable.
To add insult to injury the insurance assessor informs me he put his daughter through university on what he has made from broken flexi cables alone.


Shortly after this my computer stopped working so upon deciding nothing else could possibly go wrong we bought a new one, arriving home from the computer store we were greeted by the sound of running water again, this time the hot water cylinder had burst, possibly should have just stayed in bed that day.


Phill
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Nemo

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #7 on: October 12, 2015, 02:42:44 pm »

'Dad, can I borrow one of your chisels?'  {:-{
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Nemo

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #8 on: October 12, 2015, 02:45:33 pm »

Or even worse - 'Dad, I borrowed one of your chisels last night - was that OK?'  >>:-(
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Martin (Admin)

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #9 on: October 12, 2015, 03:28:58 pm »


"About the new car.... good news and bad news."
"What's the bad news?"
"Same as the good news, the air bags work!"
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mook

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #10 on: October 12, 2015, 04:57:40 pm »

Dave if I was you I would get rid of the wife seems she keeps finding problems {-)
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BFSMP

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #11 on: October 12, 2015, 06:34:23 pm »

Jim..........I've decided not to divorce you after all.....want to spend the rest of my life with you.................Ohh bummer.
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tobyker

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #12 on: October 12, 2015, 07:17:54 pm »

11pm "what's that dripping noise?"

It was a drip from the ceiling into the hold of the 1/24th Thames Hoy on top of the units in the living room (glad I'd left the hatch cover off!) go upstairs, get son out of bed and put him in ours, take bed out of room, remove carpet, take sheets of hardboard off floor, lift floorboards and find leak in 13mm copper pipe. Cut leaky bit out, solder new length in, put everything back (including son), empty Hoy and go to bed at 2 am. It turned out there was some sort of impurity in the copper pipe which had corroded through.
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mrturbo553

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #13 on: October 12, 2015, 07:38:28 pm »

"Darling , my mothers coming to stay with us for a few weeks ......" {:-{
Aid
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grendel

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #14 on: October 12, 2015, 08:18:00 pm »

Talking of drips, a couple of weeks back I broke a tap, and had to replace the sink taps, this I did, cutting the pipes back and fitting flexible hoses with isolators, unfortunately the hot tap started dripping from the connection, so this weekend I had to re do the joint on a straight piece of pipe, not in the middle of a corner. started out ok, draining the hot water system, then I went into the downstairs wc - 1/2 inch of water on the floor - whoops, the tap can fill the sink faster than it empties, sink overflow.got that mopped up, and then went to start changing the tap, undid the connector - whoops system not quite drained yet, water everywhere. Well in the end the fix took 30 seconds, but the rest of the hassle....
Grendel
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david48

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #15 on: October 12, 2015, 08:26:33 pm »

Yes tap body cracked ,new tap ,the even bad news the cold is remote from the mixer unit so to keep them matched it will need hot as well ,I have trailed the net to find a matching cold nothing ,the taps have no name or numbers . The bath room was refurbished a couple of years before we bought it and I've been here 8 years  so thy are about 10 years old .ahh well . David
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Colin Bishop

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #16 on: October 12, 2015, 09:54:50 pm »

Quote
Well in the end the fix took 30 seconds, but the rest of the hassle....

And that is why I hate plumbing.....

Colin

PS Why doesn't the quote icon feature work properly in Firefox?[/quote][/quote]
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Danny

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #17 on: October 12, 2015, 09:58:10 pm »

With all the trouble you guys have with water, I'm surprised you ever took up model boating!!  %%

dougal99

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #18 on: October 12, 2015, 10:11:27 pm »

Did I forget to mention...?
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dougal99

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #19 on: October 12, 2015, 10:13:21 pm »

At the Airport/ferry terminal.


I thought you had the passports
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Capt Podge

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #20 on: October 13, 2015, 12:27:56 am »

Remember when our 4th child was born and we agreed that our family is now complete ? ....well, now we're gonna need a bigger car. :o
 
(...and that one is true Ladies and Gentlemen - I know - 1 vasectomy later....) {-)
 
 
Regards,
 
Ray. (Super Dad) O0
 
 
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inertia

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #21 on: October 13, 2015, 09:00:25 am »

Argument 're-igniters' (i.e. she didn't win by a knock-out in Round 1):

"I only meant to say that......"

"Am I not allowed to be funny?"

"Why do you always......"

"And I suppose it was OK when you......"

DM


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essex2visuvesi

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #22 on: October 13, 2015, 01:13:35 pm »

Wife/Significan other: "Should i wear the red one or the blue one?"
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inertia

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #23 on: October 13, 2015, 02:02:04 pm »

Wife/Significan other: "Should i wear the red one or the blue one?"

TWO dresses? Gary - you spoil that woman.
Dave M
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Netleyned

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Re: Things you do not want to hear
« Reply #24 on: October 13, 2015, 02:08:07 pm »

Nah
Red or Blue


Ned
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