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Author Topic: What's your phone message ?  (Read 1569 times)

Capt Podge

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What's your phone message ?
« on: October 14, 2015, 10:37:19 pm »

What I'm referring to here is the message you use on your household ansaphone.
 
Mine is "Hello ? (pause of 3 seconds) HELLO - I'm unable to take your call at the moment but, IF you've got my mobile number you can get me there - either call or text. Otherwise just leave your number and I'll get back to you later"
 
The reason I did this is because I got sick of being pestered by cold callers. Family & close friends know my mobile number and usually get hold of me there anyway. :-))
 
Note: The pause between the 2 " hello's " was just a bit of fun...it has caught a few people out though.  {-)
 
Regards,
 
Ray.
 
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Jonty

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Re: What's your phone message ?
« Reply #1 on: October 15, 2015, 08:13:51 pm »

I always knew when my first father-in-law was having trouble with his creditors: "Esher Cemetery here, Digger O'Dell speakin'".
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I eat my peas with honey,
I've done it all my life;
It makes the peas taste funny,
But it keeps 'em on the knife.

Capt Podge

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Re: What's your phone message ?
« Reply #2 on: October 16, 2015, 12:02:23 am »

I always knew when my first father-in-law was having trouble with his creditors: "Esher Cemetery here, Digger O'Dell speakin'".

 {-) {-)
 
...reminds me of some of the ways I used to answer the phone (before I invested in the answering system):-
 
"Battersea Dogs Home - Jack Russel speaking"
 
or
 
(in falsetto voice) "Buckingham Palace - Duty Queen"
 
or
 
"War Office - who wants a fight"
 
...there were others which I'll have to try and retrieve from the old grey cells. :embarrassed:
 
Regards,
 
Ray.
 
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Bob K

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Re: What's your phone message ?
« Reply #3 on: October 16, 2015, 07:35:14 am »

"Thank you for calling this randomly selected number.
If your call is about my recent car accident, please press one.
If your call if to offer help with my PPI claim, please press two.
If you are a Microsoft engineer calling about the fault on my computer, please press three.
For all other nuisance calls please press four to hear a time wasting recording of Beethoven's Ninth.
Your call is important to us, and may be recorded for training and quality purposes."
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Mad Scientist

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Re: What's your phone message ?
« Reply #4 on: October 16, 2015, 08:24:11 pm »

Here's the one that i wanted to have, back when I worked in a certain office...

"Hello, you have reached [Office name].
We are unable to answer your call at this time.
Please leave a message at the sound of the BLEEP, and we will return your call at your earliest inconvenience.
Thank You!"

All of us in that office were suspected of being up to something (our bosses weren't stupid!), and eventually, a pre-recorded message was placed on the phone system. A sensible precaution!

Tom
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Capt Podge

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Re: What's your phone message ?
« Reply #5 on: October 16, 2015, 11:38:59 pm »

"Thank you for calling this randomly selected number.
If your call is about my recent car accident, please press one.
If your call if to offer help with my PPI claim, please press two.
If you are a Microsoft engineer calling about the fault on my computer, please press three.
For all other nuisance calls please press four to hear a time wasting recording of Beethoven's Ninth.
Your call is important to us, and may be recorded for training and quality purposes."


 {-) {-) {-)
 
Thanks for that Bob - I've been trying to think of something along those lines.
 
Maybe I would change the last line to read "your call is unimportant to me BUT, it is being recorded in case needed for future mitigation. :police: O0 .
 
Regards,
 
Ray.
 
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Danny

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Re: What's your phone message ?
« Reply #6 on: October 17, 2015, 10:04:36 am »

"If your call is about my new Volkswagen, cough once,
if it about my wife's new Skoda, cough twice".



tobyker

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Re: What's your phone message ?
« Reply #7 on: October 19, 2015, 11:00:36 pm »

"You have reached Bates' motel. Oh, hang on a minute, "Coming, Mother".......
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