Model Boat Mayhem

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length.
Pages: [1] 2 3   Go Down

Author Topic: I will never understand women!  (Read 12061 times)

Brian60

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 3,316
  • Location: Hull,UK-but currently residing in Los Martinez, Spain.
I will never understand women!
« on: October 17, 2015, 10:17:18 AM »

I've been married for 35 years and still can't understand them.

Five years ago I had to buy a wardrobe for our guest bedroom. Immediately all of my clothing was moved into it so that wifey could expand her clothing apparel. Now it;s not really a hardship walking down to the other bedroom every morning it's something I have accepted.

Two years ago I had to buy another wardrobe to go in our hobby room as her clothing had overgrown the wardrobe and two sets of chests of drawers in our bedroom.

During the night we were woken by a loud cracking noise, on investigation the clothing rail in the wardrobe  had collapsed and not for the first time! So this morning I set about fixing it, replacing the timber rail with aluminium pole of 35mm diameter.

I made up two new brackets to support the ends and as I was drilling and screwing them to the inside I happened to remark as to why she had FIVE shoeboxes of the same shoes in there- MISTAKE!

"They are NOT the same, they are different colours of the same! To match different clothing. Anyway its the same with your tools. You've got two of those drills"

When I pointed out that I had one of them for 18 years and the second one she bought for me as a surprise xmas present 6 years ago was totally lost on her. It seems in the world of women it doesn't matter if clothing from last year is perfectly wearable, it just has to be replaced with what to us men is more of the same for this year. Then on top of that keep the stuff they will never wear again because it looks 'pretty' Hmmmmmmm..........I'm sure there are many who can relate to this.

Martin [Admin]

  • Administrator
  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 19,236
  • Location: Peterborough, UK
    • Model Boat Mayhem
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #1 on: October 17, 2015, 11:53:03 AM »

"I've been married for 35 years and still can't understand them."

"I happened to remark as to why she had FIVE shoeboxes of the same shoes in there"

Another man that like me, that has learnt nothing about women in all the years we've been married.
 What has logic got to with Anything!
Logged
"This is my firm opinion, but what do I know?!"    -   Mayhem FaceBook Group!

nivapilot

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 301
  • re-invented rc boater
  • Location: Sarisbury Green
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #2 on: October 17, 2015, 12:24:40 PM »

Can I join this club as well please? :embarrassed:
Logged

jaymac

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1,257
  • Location: Somerset
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #3 on: October 17, 2015, 12:38:27 PM »

As is women who ask if their Bums look big in this live longer than men who confirm it
Logged

merseyferry

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 353
  • Location: liverpool
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #4 on: October 17, 2015, 01:46:06 PM »

reminds me of when i was changeing the food cupbards in the kitchen , helped with a friend. the  units were everywere,so started to take one down to replace with the new ...turning to put old unit down , picking up new one we turned back to  fit to wall ...... there she was painting the wall, were she sprang from i still dont know, >:-o >:-o >:-o ok said i why on earth are you painting the wall when we carnt see it when the units are up.. because  i will know its clean behind there (it was clean to stary with) says she  so now its me my  friend  lots of units and her with a bloomin paint brush  come on woman give us some space.. oh my draws a little tiny one bottom right of bedroom unit
Logged

martno1fan

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2,510
  • Location: Blackpool
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #5 on: October 17, 2015, 02:25:03 PM »

Life would be pretty boring if we understood women  O0 ,plus we would have nothing to moan about  {:-{ lol.
Logged

mickyrubble

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 120
  • Location: 54'35.9 North.7'18.8 West
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #6 on: October 17, 2015, 02:32:25 PM »

Can i join the club too,tiz a well known fact  that misery loves company
 :embarrassed: :D :embarrassed: :D ;D
Logged

tigertiger

  • Global Moderator
  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 7,086
  • Location: Kunming, city of eternal springtime, SW China.
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #7 on: October 17, 2015, 02:33:00 PM »

Forgot who said it, but in answer to the comment, I will never understand women, the answer came.


You are not supposed to understand them, its deliberate strategy on their part. And the moment they think you are starting to understand, they change the rules.
Logged
The only stupid question is the one I didn't ask

regiment

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1,706
  • Location: perranporth cornwall
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #8 on: October 17, 2015, 03:37:42 PM »

been married 63 years this december still do not under stand them   gordon
Logged

dodes

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 655
  • Location: Hampshire
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #9 on: October 17, 2015, 05:46:43 PM »

I am the same never understood the other sex, just agreed with her and paid the bills. Just had a nasty thought, if I did start to understand would that mean I would have to have a sex change operation and spend all day discussing soap programmes and what colour hair dye to use!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Logged

DavidHughes

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 39
  • Model Boat Mayhem is Great!
  • Location: Northampton
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #10 on: October 17, 2015, 05:49:18 PM »

I've always worked on the premise that it's not knowing how they work that makes them so enticing...kind of like complex engineering.
 
...and life would be awfully dull without them....
 
:-)
Logged

grasshopper

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 744
  • Location: Lincolnshire!
    • A1 Hobbies Ltd.
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #11 on: October 17, 2015, 06:13:38 PM »

I'm in too....but I do understand them a little better after nearly thirty years, just say yes when you're supposed to and 'if you'd like' when you're not sure.


plus I too have my own 'dressing room' now, I got all my stuff moved into a back bedroom wardrobe along with the ironing board and drying rack. Madam has all of the wardrobes in the rest of the other three bedrooms, she also has most of the under bed storage drawers for 'seasonal clothing'
Logged

GAZOU

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1,102
  • Model Boat Mayhem is Great!
  • Location: ROCHEFORT FRANCE
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #12 on: October 17, 2015, 06:39:45 PM »

 {:-{

I see that the women in UK are as the European women.
I thought that the men were happier over there
Logged

Unsinkable 2

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 520
  • Location: France ( near Guerande)
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #13 on: October 17, 2015, 07:09:10 PM »

I've tried English and French versions, they're all the same...... My OH just got a new cat and I'm under orders not to let it out for at least a week. Then SHE left the door open, out it went and it was MY FAULT %% . Work that one out.......

Logged
It'll look better when it's finished!

Bob K

  • Bob K
  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 3,699
  • Location: Windsor
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #14 on: October 17, 2015, 07:21:52 PM »

I have found that two words can either solve, or at least mitigate, almost all problems in dealing with women.  "Yes Dear."  They are as incomprehensible as the universe itself.

"There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.
There is another theory, which states that this has already happened."

Logged
HMS Skirmisher (1905), HMS Amazon (1906), HMS K9 (1915), Type 212A (2002), HMS Polyphemus (1881), Descartes (1897), Iggle Piggle boat (CBBC), HMS Royal Marine (1943), HMS Marshall Soult, HMS Agincourt (1912)

Nemo

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1,866
  • Location: Sussex.
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #15 on: October 17, 2015, 07:25:13 PM »

I've just been visiting my old Regiments' website and found a Topic headed 'Once you are married, dying becomes easy'    {-)
Logged

grendel

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1,713
  • Location: Canterbury, Kent, UK
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #16 on: October 17, 2015, 07:51:56 PM »

I've tried English and French versions, they're all the same...... My OH just got a new cat and I'm under orders not to let it out for at least a week. Then SHE left the door open, out it went and it was MY FAULT %% . Work that one out.......


Thats easy - whatever it is its OUR FAULT
Logged

Nemo

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1,866
  • Location: Sussex.
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #17 on: October 17, 2015, 07:57:01 PM »

 :-))
Logged

nivapilot

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 301
  • re-invented rc boater
  • Location: Sarisbury Green
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #18 on: October 17, 2015, 08:42:02 PM »

Contrary to popular belief....I at least have the last word on anything in our house...."Yes dear.) O0
Logged

derekwarner

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 8,135
  • Location: Wollongong Australia
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #19 on: October 17, 2015, 08:55:22 PM »

Yes....universal scenario throughout the world O0......I have a total of 37 years qualification [17 + 20].... one would have thought the first sentence  <*< was long enough  {-)..... Derek
Logged
Derek Warner

Honorary Secretary [Retired]
Illawarra Live Steamers Co-op
Australia
www.ils.org.au

Nemo

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1,866
  • Location: Sussex.
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #20 on: October 17, 2015, 09:12:48 PM »

Engagement RING > Wedding RING > Suffer RING
 :}
Logged

davidm1945

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 344
  • Location: Worcestershire UK
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #21 on: October 17, 2015, 09:34:48 PM »

No 1 rule for successful marriage :- when having a "disagreement" and you know 100% that you are right and she is wrong - apologise immediately!!
Works for me - 40 years this year.... :-))

Dave.
Logged
Never worry about theory as long as the machinery does what it's supposed to do. Robert A Heinlein.

RAAArtyGunner

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 3,852
  • Location: Brisbane, Australia
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #22 on: October 18, 2015, 01:39:49 AM »


Have you noticed it is the same the world over.

We are not supposed to understand them, even if you have read the book, Men are from Mars women are from Venus, you are none the wiser.

Hence why they are always correct when they say you (the bloke) don't understand me and her female companions/mother/daughter say there, there dear, it's OK.

I am only a young fella having started late and have only 44 years experience of wedded bliss.

For the really young guys the attachment may be useful, no guarantees and good luck. {-) {-) {-) {-)

Logged
Gunna build those other boats one day.

sparkey

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1,228
  • I think I am as mad as I think I am then I am mad
  • Location: wandsworth
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #23 on: October 18, 2015, 08:28:45 AM »

 ;D Men have been talking about this subject for thousands of years and we still don't understand women,their logic is completely at odds with ours,many years ago I was working away from home and on the Friday night I rang my wife to tell I would be home by 9 o'clock,my wife has always drummed it into me that if your going to be late ring me to stop me worrying,there was a major accident on the north circular road and was stuck in a jam for 2 hours,so after 30mins I rang the wife to tell her I would be late,when I got home she started on me about ringing her to say I was running late as it caused her to worry!,my answer as always YES DEAR.......Ray ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D     
Logged
My boats are all wood like my head fluctuat nec mergitur

dougal99

  • Full Mayhemer
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2,948
  • Huntingdon, Cambs, England
  • Location: Huntingdon, England
Re: I will never understand women!
« Reply #24 on: October 18, 2015, 09:16:30 AM »

I'm the boss in my house.








My wife says I can be
Logged
Don't Assume Check
Pages: [1] 2 3   Go Up