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Author Topic: Jokes & Humour - 2018  (Read 21233 times)

warspite

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #25 on: May 24, 2018, 08:10:46 pm »

He means the little black square with a white cross in it when the picture fails to load. 3 pictures of a nut bar therefore 3 squares
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Martin (Admin)

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #26 on: May 24, 2018, 10:02:28 pm »


Ah.... browser issue
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RAAArtyGunner

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #27 on: May 25, 2018, 05:43:51 am »

Must have been can see the husks now O0 O0
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Martin (Admin)

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #28 on: June 15, 2018, 01:49:00 pm »


Heard a good one today:




Husband: My wife caught me cheating, she found some letters I had carefully hidden.


Wife:    'I'm never playing Scrabble with you ever again!'


 


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Baldrick

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #29 on: July 08, 2018, 10:44:07 am »

off the BBC web.


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derekwarner

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #30 on: July 08, 2018, 01:17:44 pm »

Sorry...who is Gareth?....or am I on the wrong page?
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Baldrick

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #31 on: July 08, 2018, 02:06:44 pm »

No, Just in the wrong country.
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warspite

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #32 on: July 08, 2018, 04:26:07 pm »

Not a fan of it my self - but can put together most of the stuff with reasonable ease ------ oh you mean the football manager - bit premature don't you think (don't like the sport to be honest)  {-)
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Martin (Admin)

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #33 on: July 13, 2018, 05:57:04 pm »


I bought a can of fly spay today, to if it's any goo.
 It's not. I spayed the entire can on myself but I still can't fly. 
    {-)
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roycv

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #34 on: July 13, 2018, 08:41:01 pm »

You want to get your 'R's in gear.Roy
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Baldrick

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #35 on: July 14, 2018, 02:53:13 pm »


I bought a can of fly spay today, to if it's any goo.
 It's not. I spayed the entire can on myself but I still can't fly.
   



Bloke here in Denia  sprayed two complete cans of  spray around his bedroom  then lit a cigarette , found he could fly ! at least as far as the apartment car park.


 
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Martin (Admin)

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #36 on: July 14, 2018, 05:19:27 pm »

 
              {-) {-)
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Martin (Admin)

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #37 on: July 17, 2018, 07:35:18 pm »

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Martin (Admin)

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #38 on: July 17, 2018, 07:45:49 pm »



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Martin (Admin)

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #39 on: July 17, 2018, 07:46:10 pm »


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Martin (Admin)

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #40 on: July 17, 2018, 07:46:18 pm »



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birlinn

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #41 on: July 29, 2018, 09:05:07 pm »

My aged father had a fall today, whilst mucking out the stable- he's in the hospice now.
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Martin (Admin)

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #42 on: July 29, 2018, 09:30:33 pm »


Had to read that three times....  {-) {-) {-)
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dougal99

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #43 on: July 29, 2018, 10:06:40 pm »

Someone is taking the proverbial  :police:
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tigertiger

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #44 on: July 30, 2018, 03:27:06 am »

Auspicious  ;)
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Martin (Admin)

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #45 on: August 02, 2018, 09:41:07 pm »

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Martin (Admin)

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #46 on: September 19, 2018, 11:16:26 am »


I saw some frightening behaviour  on the beach the other day.

I was on the seaside and saw a man and a woman having an almighty argument in front of loads of kids.
Suddenly the woman smacked the guy in the head and it all kicked off.
There was a massive brawl and someone called the police.
This poor copper turned up on his own and took his truncheon to the man.
The bloke managed to snatch it off the policeman and actually attacked the copper AND his wife!


Then out of nowhere a crocodile crept in  and stole all the sausages!
 
 
 
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jaymac

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #47 on: September 19, 2018, 01:03:13 pm »



Then out of nowhere a crocodile crept in  and stole all the sausages!
 
 


Is that what they mean by the Punch Line ?
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Martin (Admin)

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #48 on: September 19, 2018, 01:51:44 pm »


OK, how about....


I was raised by a pack of Hyenas as a child.
It was a hard life, always hunting and being shot at.
 
But boy, did we laugh.

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Martin (Admin)

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2018
« Reply #49 on: September 19, 2018, 02:22:41 pm »


If 1+1 makes 2
2x2 makes 4
3x3 makes 9

So how comes 0x0 makes gravy ?

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