Bedivere-1
When my “Olwen” leave finally expired I really think that MoD hadn’t a clue what to do with me. A bit of “insight” (from my perspective) may help. By 1989 the RFA fleet had been reduced a fair bit from what it was like in 1982. Then it wasn’t uncommon for a ship to carry a 1/O(X). As a group we were all ex-navigating officers who were sort of removed from bridge and “operational” duties to being more a senior officer with more “whole ship” responsibilities. Very few of which had a “nautical” bent. Well, OK, some did.
I’ll try and give you a bit of a run-down on the duties we had.
1…NBCD Officer.
This put the 1/O(X) in charge of all aspects of Fire Fighting (and training), the maintenance of all associated equipment (with the aid of an AB who did the actual work), keeping up to date with Chemical defence procedures, and although widely ignored having a “plan” in case of a Nuclear or Biological threat (a not impossible scenario in the late 60s and 70s). Damage control…mainly doing the training for the guys doing the getting wet and hammering wedges in and so forth…as well as learning stuff from the Engineering staff about emergency ballasting and so on.
2…Naval Stores Officer.
All stores ordered for the deck department were done via the 1/O(X). This could be a huge undertaking. From a new chronometer for the bridge, through sail twine for the deck store-keeper to new RAS hoses for the rigs. The catalogues for this stuff were vast, and took a fair amount of learning a way about them. Then the dreaded “accounts” had to be kept up to date. Stores were classified as “consumable” (paint and stuff), “Permanent” (anything that wasn’t “consumable”), or V & A (Valuable and Attractive…..such as a chronometer). All had to be ledgered and inspected as “being there” on a regular basis. That’s where the “Olwen” had fallen down….the inspections hadn’t been done, but the boxes had been ticked. All comes to rest on somebody!
3…Loan Clothing Officer.
It may or not be well known that an RFA ship had a bigger stock of “menswear” than your average Marks’n’Sparks. I can’t recall stocking underpants, but that’s about the only item. Of course, the system was originally brought in to provide the crews with “working gear”, but, like Topsy, it just growed and growed. Seamen come in all sizes, from huge and burly to thin and scrawny….just like the rest of us. So over the years the ships had become a “catch-all” supermarket. I kid you not here, but it wasn’t at all unusual for a crew member to join the ship with only a plastic supermarket bag as luggage. The ship would provide. Foul-Weather clothing. (for a cook!?), Fair weather stuff (to go ashore in). DMS Boots in all sizes and widths ( and both available as either electrically “conductive” or “non-conductive”). Plimsolls (sandshoes to you and me) were used as slippers (all “authorised”). “T” shirts (white) used for anything you wanted. You get my drift here. Or you think you do. As it was all “free”, not much care was taken to look after all this stuff. Even though we always had a ships laundry (then run by a couple of Chinese chaps) I would regularly get some idiot who wanted a new whatever because “this one is dirty”. And all this gubbins had to be ledgered both “in” and “out” against the persons name. And (according to the “rules”) when they left the ship all the filthy stuff they’d had issued had to be returned and bagged for disposal. I fell foul of this rule (but only temporarily) by refusing to accept “returns” from contracted people. Instead, I made out a “permanent loan form” to them which meant that they had to take the used items away with them and use whatever it was on their next ship. At first this didn’t work, but once I started sending photo-copies to that ship…well, things changed a bit. But really, MoD didn’t give a stuff. Wastage in MoD…tell me about it!
4…
Explosives and Armaments Officer.
This is a post that for very sensible reasons is decreed to be shared between 2 “responsible” officers. One officer is supposed to be the armaments “accounting” officer, and the other is supposed to be in charge of the stowage and subsequent issue/ use of such stuff. Never happened in my experience. Both tasks were loaded on to one person (the 1O(X)). This was obviously wide open to fiddles, but no-one seemed to care. But MoD did care about some things. An example. If we had a 20mm “shoot” then all expended shell casings had to be collected and counted…and the count of fired and collected had to tally otherwise a “letter” would eventually arrive. With a 20mm gun mounted so the barrel hangs over the ships side…..guess wher a lot of the casings went. Explain that to the “suits” in Whitehall. But this was minor stuff when I became sort of responsible for the various bits of “nasty” we eventually started carrying.( This is all on a “tanker”….not on a stores/ammo ship where we had specialised guys looking after it all.),
5…Liaison Officer.
Responsible for making sure his-nibs gets to where he’s supposed to be at, at the right time. Organize trips out for the crew (normally a "xxxxx"-up). This was always a pain in the nether regions.
6…Flight Deck Officer.
Again, started from humble beginnings, but when the “Forts” came in, being capable of carrying and operating 5 Sea Kings it was a bit too much to ask of the RFA ships company. When I first started this lark we had either a single Wessex embarked or a visiting (temporary) flight that brought their own personell. That got whittled away. Also as FDO the 1O(X) would be responsible for all things pertaining to flying operations…including the loading, issuing and quality control of the AVCAT. Smelly stuff…..but great for cleaning small paint brushes.
It wasn’t for nothing that the RN equivalent was nicknamed the “OJO” (Odd Jobs Officer). Sometimes it was rewarding (only sometimes), but in general………
As time went by, a bit of common-dog started to creep in. Like, why have a Pursers department that doesn’t do stores other than the catering type things. Why is the Ch.Engineer just an “advisor” to the NBCDO when he knows (or should) the ships systems better than any deck officer could ever hope to. Give the Liaison bit to the Ops officer….that’s what he’s there for. Clothing…give that to the pursers as well.
Eventually the Flight Deck went to the pursers/engineers as well…….
But as you can tell, my function in the ship was becoming more and more redundant. No bad thing really.But what does the MoD do with the 6 or 7 of us who are left?
All of us were fully qualified Master Mariners (Foreign Going), we all knew each other pretty well after meeting up quite often over the years. I guess it was a bit of a shame that “some” had succumbed to the blandishments of larger houses and private schools. Me? I’m a parsimonious little sod….and I actually like where we live, and never really wanted to move (upwards, sideways or even downwards)..so here I happily sit. But we all knew that no promotion was going to come our way, so we had no real inkling what MoD had in store for us. Being one of the minority percentage that was by then mortgage-free, and number one (and only) son about to build his own nest, it occurred to me that an “early retirement” could be an option. Perhaps in 5 years or so when I’d be 55. But how was the next 6 years to be played out.
This was when I was appointed to “Sir Bedivere” (again). Regular readers of this spiel will know that I had always loved the LSLs, so I was happy about this. In the normal course of events the position of Nav/Ops officer would be delegated to a 2/O, so having an experienced 1/O aboard raised a few eyebrows (especially at Marchwood, where they were used to being able to flannel a youngster). Some may have thought that this job was a sort of “demotion”….but in no way did I think that. I was back doing the sort of job that I loved, in a ship I enjoyed being in and with people I liked being with. No change in “rank” or salary…just a change of tasking. Smashing!
The Captain I knew very well from other ships and apart from the times when “formally” was required it was to be an amicable period….albeit a hard work one. I also think “he” was secretly relieved that he had a rather experienced guy on the bridge that he didn’t have to be constantly watching. But perhaps that’s just my vanity. I even enjoyed “doing” the 4-8 watches again! Apart from doing our “stint” on the Marchwood-Antwerp trot we did eventually get to do a longish, coldish, roughish and all sorts of other “ishes” spell in another Norwegian winter.
But first, a little “backtrack”. Because of the “usual” relative inexperience of the bridge staff on an LSL the Marchwood-Antwerp thing was very stressful for the Captain. All this charging up and down the English Channel, finding a way around the infamous “Sandettie Roundabout”, getting past all the ships at anchor and so on was apparently beginning to take its toll on the bosses health. Poor lambs.To alleviate this stress it had been decreed that after 3 “runs” the Captain would have a trip off. Great for him, not so good for the others. However, trusting as he may have been, he was a bit taken aback when I proposed to go out of the Solent via the inshore passage. Past readers may recall how I hated the run up, round and past the “Bramble”…not because it was dangerous or anything, just that it always seemed such a waste of time. The inshore passage is a bit odd…as are the tides in the Solent. But if the mathematics are done right then the passage is perfectly feasible for an LSL, even though there would be less than 2 feet of water under the ship (in places). Doing that route could either shave a couple of hours off the run or, more importantly, have a bit of time in hand rather than flogging the ships guts out to meet a deadline. I guess I won my “spurs” with that.
But a couple of months later I found myself for one of the very few times in my life at sea to be seriously worried (a bit scared, in fact).
We’d been sent to Dundee to pick up a contingent of Marines to take to Norway. The weather forecast was pretty poor, but nothing unusual. (This was the trip when my glasses froze to my head).
The LSLs had a long history of bursting their flexible fuel lines, and when this happened the ship more or less came to a grinding halt….in a nautical way. So reliability in bad weather was quite important. For some reason that escapes me now, I went to the bridge for my morning watch a lot earlier than I usually did. We weren’t rolling or anything, but the stern seemed to be lifting a lot. We were actually “surfing” on some waves. Come daylight the sight astern was horrific. Even though the bridge was only a few yards forward of the funnel I could see the wave tops over the top of the funnel as we dropped into a trough. It later transpired that we’d been caught by one of those “once in 100 years” storms. The 4-8 watch went by with a lot of nervousness on my part, so I elected to stay up there during the 8-12 bit…just as well.
The young 3/O never once looked astern of the ship, but seemed intent on carrying on a conversation with a rather inattentive helmsman. Honestly, I kid you not. If the ship had broached we would have gone over in a twinkling. I was getting a bit scared by this time. The helmsman became abusive when I told him to concentrate…so I had him relieved. Capt. and I took over the watch….and so it went on. Others were also concerned for our safety…even our” Lords in the Admiralty” sent a signal asking if we were OK. Eventually we got to where we had to hang a quick left turn into milder waters……thank goodness for the massive inherent stability of the LSLs. One roll of probably 40 degrees and we were through. I never ever, ever wanted another couple of days like that. But it still amazes me that others on board just thought it all a big surf ride. Ignorance can be bliss, I suppose.
But the fjiords beckoned. In and out, up and down, mooring in places where the only place to drop the stern ramp was on the local main road (which seriously "xxxxx" off the locals). And onwards, more to the north. Past the end of the famous Blue Glacier, and into a land of almost permanent darkness and gloom. I must admit that the moonlight showing up the Lofoten Islands was spectacular, as were all the stars and the occasional bursts of the “Northern Lights” (I only ever saw them in shades of green, never the multicoloured variety). We’d been directed (by the Army) to a little place north of Tromso. Two am. A rickety wooden jetty opposite a chipboard factory. No-one there, so our crew had to nip ashore to tie us up. And so we waited…and waited. You’ve already guessed….I think that the notion of Latitude and Longitude is an alien concept to our khaki clad brethren. Wrong port. (And not for the first time!).
I think we just more or less said “sod-it”, and went to Tromso. I really like Tromso, even in the dark. The pubs are always full of students, although with the price of beer over there I can’t imagine them drinking very much.
Then we had to do a beach-landing. In Norway? First find a beach. Just about every bit of coastline rises vertically out of the sea. Then it has to be the “right sort of beach”. Eventually found one not too far from Tromso. So we did that. Bunged the vehicles and troops ashore and letting the army officers work out how to get an armoured car up a near vertical cliff. Not my problem ‘guv.
It was about this time that “our” carrier made a boo-boo and got a bit too close to some rocks, no need for enemy action this time. So farewell to her for a few months. (see where your taxes are going?).
Leaving this area there were no pilots available for the long slog south, so we had to take the open sea route…..bang, straight into big nasties. The bridge on an LSL had video feeds from various “vulnerable” parts of the ship, so it wasn’t very long before I saw water spurting into the bow space compartment through a gap in the bow doors. Ooopsy. Another awkward “turn-around” and head for calmer waters to fix it.
We had other “bits’n’bobs” to do, but eventually my time on Bedivere was up, go on leave, and re-enter the “mainstream”. BY.