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[MartinH-K]

My daughter was about five years old and very talkative. One Sunday morning, I was having a very important discussion with her mother and my daughter kept asking me questions. Eventually, more to confuse her than anything else, I said... "Why don't you go down the garden and shout obsenties at the neighbours?"
I carried on my conversation. About one minute later, I heard her. I looked out of the window and saw her standing at the end of the garden and, at the top of her voice she was shouting... "Obsenities! Obsenities!"

[toesupwa]

The little boy (5 year old) passed by the patio while i was out there working...

I overheard his Mother say.. "No, you CANT take him for a ride!" .. at which point i looked up to see what was going on...

With a sigh and a "Owwwwww" (think 5 year old here) he reached in to his pocket and slowly pulled out a.... worm...

It turns out that he wanted to take the worm he had found out for a ride to the zoo...

Makes all little boys and Fathers smile eh?..

[barryfoote]

.....and mothers scream!!

[BIG ALAN]

DOMINION MONARCH LEAVING WELLINGTON ON A COASTAL PASSAGE TO AUKLAND, SOME OF THE HANDS HAD PASSED THE BAKERS SHOP ON THE WAY TO THE DECK THEY HAD GATHERED ARMFULLS OF STALE BREAD ROLES FROM A BASKET OUTSIDE THE BAKERY.
                                                   AS THE D M PULLED AWAY FROM THE QUAY, FRIENDS  AND FOLK WHO  HAD COME TO SEE US OFF WERE ASSAILED WITH A BARRAGE OF BREAD ROLES AND THE PEOPLE ON THE QUAY STARTED THROWING THEM BACK
                                                   ON OUR ARRIVAL AT AUKLAND THE PAPERS CARRIED THE HEADLINES   " DISRGACEFUL DISPLAY BY DOMINION MONARCH CREW WHO ON LEAVING WELLINGTON,    MISSILES WERE THROWN AND  ABUSE SHOUTED
                                                      WHEN WE SAILED FROM AUKLAND NO MISSILES WERE THROWN, THE CAPTAIN HAD TAKEN THE PRECAUTION OF HAVING THE DECK HOSES MANNED BUT THIS DIDN'T STOP THE HANDS LINING THE RAILS CHORUSING  ABUSE  ABUSE ABUSE ABUSE.