Charley, a newly retired gent got a job as a greeter at B&Q but just couldn't seem to get to work on time. Every day he was 5, 10, sometimes 15 minutes late. But he was a good worker, really tidy, clean-shaven, sharp-minded, a real credit to the company and, obviously, demonstrating their "Older Person Friendly" policies.
One day the boss was in a real quandary about how to deal with it and,finally, he called Charley into the office for a talk. "Charley, I have to tell you, I like your work ethic, you do a bang-up job, but your being late so often is quite bothersome."
"Yes, I know boss, and I am working on it."
"Well good! You are a team player. That's what I like to hear. Your coming in late is odd, though. I know you're retired from the Armed Forces. What did they say when you came in late there?"
"They said, 'Good morning, Admiral. Tea or coffee this morning, sir?'"