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[ABRAD]

A man comes out of the news agents and sees a funeral, with the Hurst and coffin followed by a line of people mainly men, which stretches all the way down the high street.
At the head of the funeral is a man with a big black dog with a muzzle.
He walks over to the man and asks who's funeral it is, the man with the dog replies it's the the wife's.
The man then asks how did she die, the man with the dog says the dog mauled her to death.
The man says any chance of borrowing the dog.
The man with the dog says yes


GET TO THE BACK OF THE QUE

[Martin (Admin)]

Dave Alan at large lives!!!!

[dougal99]

Two guys playing golf are on the eighteenth hole. The score is very close and guy 1 just has to sink a 18" putt for the game. Just then a funeral cortege passes, guy 1 looks up from his putt, sees the cortege, stands upright, removes his cap and bows his head. His opponent is amazed and says "That is the most touching thing I've ever seen."

Guy 1 replies "Well. she was a good wife."

[sheerline]

If this has been done before, I apologise but I haven't read all the jokes which have abounded on this thread.

Bloke comes out of the chip shop, there's a bird leaning against the wall outside, eating chips and with her knickers around her ankles. Observing this, the bloke sidles up to her and says "excuse me but do you realise your knickers are down around your ankles" The bird looks up from her chips and says ..."Oh.. he's gone"!

[Mr Andy]

That was very very funny

Andy.

[grasshopper]

Sheerline,

Did you leave the location out of the joke on purpose ? When I heard that one it was "Bloke comes out of a chip shop in ESSEX"

They say that's why Essex girls wear pants - to keep their ankles warm....

[portside II]

dropping some flowers off at the local cemetery the other day and see 6 bearers carrying a coffin come past
ten minutes later they come past again
i think to myself "they must have lost the plot"
daz

[White Ensign]

... don`t blame it on the Golfers, could happen to shipmodelers as well....


And don`t blame it to the girls in Essex, Iserlohn in Germany is famous for similar reasons. The German citty with the most illegitimate children. So When I was at the forces there was a saying: "Never beat a child in Iserlohn- it could be yours!"