Model Boat Mayhem
Mess Deck: General Section => Humour => Topic started by: wullie/mk2 on July 16, 2012, 12:55:08 pm
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Every spring i would await the arrival of the swallows that nested in my outbuildings,I looked forward to them wheeling around the sky,and raising their young,they were a simple pleasure,this year was no different.......until 5 minutes ago,..i went into my boat shed, only to discover the little blighters had squeezed through a gap in the skylight, and did what swallows also do best,...crapped and my Bismarck was below their perch,...aargh!...i suppose i can think myself lucky,that it was only the stern area that got hit,..had it been amidship then cleaning the remains of hundreds of dead flies off the superstructure would have been a nightmare,.....suffice to say,they won,t be sleeping in there tonight,
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Typical kicking them out in this weather - surely you could just cover over the model for a few more weeks
Geoff
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And what if there is a nest there, with eggs or Young there my I be so bold to ask??
Do as Pugwash says and cover the model and put up with it for a while.
LB
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As above Wullie, or you could always swallow your pride and get out the mop & bucket. {-)
john
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Gie them a break Wul, they`ve come all the way from South Africa just to poop on your poop deck. A rare privilege in my book. Just be happy it wasn't an Osprey %% {-)
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Gie them a break Wul, they`ve come all the way from South Africa just to poop on your poop deck. A rare privilege in my book. Just be happy it wasn't an Osprey %% {-)
Or an Ostrich...... :o
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An ostrich flyin` geez...the mind boggles, you been on the Scrumpie ?
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Is that why they call it a poop deck?
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I might have known,...well,before any of you lot,start thinking about,the protection of pare wee burds,society,...can i just say,had there been a wee burds hoose in the shed,i,d have moved my boats,but as they are already living,and raising young in another part of the outbuildings,and not in my boat shed,...then i feel its time to "close" the windae,so to speak and then i,ll have nae poops on my poop deck Duncan,and as for it being lucky,...i,m sure thats if you stand in the stuff,......but not so lucky if a dollop of it lands on yer favourite boat, {-) {-)
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And what if there is a nest there, with eggs
Breakfast!
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Are these birds related to WWII RAF? Bombing the stern of the Bismark and all...... :D
A guy looks up at some birds just in time to get a "blessing" in his eye. Says "They sing for some people..."
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I suppose when they,ve stopped nesting and taken off for warmer climes,i could use their nests for birds nest soup,...after all it is a type of swallows nest that is used,... {-)apparently its the saliva that helps hold the nest together that is the important ingredient,
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Birds nest soup then Wullie - aren't you the lucky one?!
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{-) {-) {-) {-) {-) {-) {-) {-) {-) {-) {-) {-) aye, that,ll be the day,...and how they can eat" deep fried chickens tootsies" is beyond me,..and before you all start piling out of the woodwork,...deep fried Mars Bars, are a different kettle of fish, {-) {-) {-) {-)
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Most nests are built during the breeding season by the male swiftlet over a period of 35 days. They take the shape of a shallow cup stuck to the cave wall. The nests are composed of interwoven strands of salivary laminae cement. Both nests have high levels of calcium, iron, potassium, and magnesium, not forgetting spit !
Cream o' veg fer me thanks !
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Yes lovely to watch but terrible to clean up after. Especially when they have raised a family in the workshop.
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deep fried Mars Bars, are a different kettle of fish, {-) {-) {-) {-)
No fish in the last Mars bar I ate
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No fish in the last Mars bar I ate
They are fish finger shape though. O0 {-)
john
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Back on topic Wullie, remember the knife scene in Crocodile Dundee "you call THAT a knife" ? Well this what I call a fair bit o` poop. >:-o Bombed on the bow and midships. Tarps for the river for a couple of days methinks <:(
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Its good for the garden,makes the taters grow,
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That ain't swallows arrow that looks like a sh*te hawks nest mate O0 O0 :-))
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Now that the wee Burdies have flown the nest,i,ve locked them out of my nice warm shed,....but,they did have the last,sh*t before i was able to close all the entry points, they got my Bismarck,again,aft, and my Schnellbootie on the fore,....surprisingly,they missed the Vliestroom,which was standing between the 2,......how they knew, it was,nt mine,i,ll never know,....but they are out now, and they are not getting back in,....well not this year year,.....
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Wullie,
Thank your lucky stars that Coos don't fly.
George
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They don,t have to....their mines are everywhere....and its when you least expect it....you stand on one.....
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aah...but how many did you manage to get into a pie though ??
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What is it with pies on this forum? Your'e all obsessed with them.
Dave
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aah...but how many did you manage to get into a pie though ??
your thinking of blackbirds...and it was 4 and 20 {-)
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What is it with pies on this forum? Your'e all obsessed with them.
Dave
well it makes a change,from being obsessed with model boats....and,now at least my neighbours children don,t call me an anorak.like they did when they saw me at the boat pond......now they just call me fat Wullie {-)
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What is it with pies on this forum? Your'e all obsessed with them.
Dave
In OZ we would refer to them as a mob of pie eaters O0 O0 O0 {-) {-) {-)
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my neighbours children don,t call me an anorak.like they did when they saw me at the boat pond......
Highly traumatised by the sight - poor kids - still undergoing therapy no dobt <:(
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Come on Wullie... where are ye ? Gies us a smert retort O0
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Gies us a smert retort O0
Jeepers Duncan - Tort - that's a fruit pie
You'll never get one of them off Wullie.
Dave
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When I was drafted up to Wullie Land it took a while to find out an ashet pie referred to the dish it was cooked in and not the contents
Ned
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Jeepers Duncan - Tort - that's a fruit pie
You'll never get one of them off Wullie.
Dave
..and it is also a legal term as used in a tort of false imprisonment. Look up Wiki.
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When I was drafted up to Wullie Land it took a while to find out an ashet pie referred to the dish it was cooked in and not the contents
Ned
To confuse matters, there is a well known baker and pie-maker in this part of Wullie-land called Ashers. If Wullie wis here he`d tell ye. {-)
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And the winner is....................
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Sorry we cannot allow this joke
ken
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Sorry we cannot allow this joke
ken
noted
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What a lovely man. :}
ken
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No Deposit....Non Returnable
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Non recycleable?
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Non Biodegradable
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non domesticated {-)
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non assimilated
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ok you win :D
I'm trying to think how to link that back to Swallows? for as you know how Wullie hated to wander off topic {-) {-) {-)
..........well swallowing enables food assimilation and Bird's nest soup is yàn wō (燕窝), and that translates literally as "swallow's nest".
So soup it is then ................ simple plain Heinz Tomato O0
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(http://s13.postimage.org/4girhi22r/Half.jpg) (http://postimage.org/image/4girhi22r/)
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Ha - very clever - a song about plucking Larks
That reminds me of when I wasmaking a mess of plucking a Partridge. My mate from Southport took it off me and showe d me what to do.
At one point when he had his hand fully of inside it, a wagon pulled up alongside. A cockney voice asked for directions and Brian pointed straight down the road.
The driver :o said thanks but he'd be really glad to get out of Hillbilly county (toned down quote)
The look on that guys face was absolutely brilliant {-)
Dave
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Ha - very clever - a song about plucking Larks
That reminds me of when I wasmaking a mess of plucking a Partridge. My mate from Southport took it off me and showe d me what to do.
At one point when he had his hand fully of inside it, a wagon pulled up alongside. A cockney voice asked for directions and Brian pointed straight down the road.
The driver :o said thanks but he'd be really glad to get out of Hillbilly county (toned down quote)
The look on that guys face was absolutely brilliant {-)
Dave
'ere Dave!
Hope you watched 'Dad's Army" on Beeb 2 tonight.....SO characterful it was ......your views perhaps ?
http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b007867j/Dads_Army_Series_4_The_Test/ (http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b007867j/Dads_Army_Series_4_The_Test/)
Regards
Pte. Walk Bill
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Oops - no not a Partridge - a Pheasant O0 %%
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Wasn't Bill Maynard a pheasant plucker's son? I seem to recall him singing about it.
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And a pleasant plucker he was too if I remember him rightly....a ah !!!!