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Author Topic: Jokes & Humour - 2019  (Read 12345 times)

Landlocked

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #25 on: March 03, 2019, 12:15:55 AM »

 :-)) :-)) :-))
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meechingman

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #26 on: March 03, 2019, 02:22:23 PM »

Never mind the cat and the piano, Martin. Learn to play the organ instead - and I do mean the musical kind and no, that isn't me! I never had the 'tache!  :-)

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Martin [Admin]

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #27 on: March 03, 2019, 03:05:04 PM »


Talking of musical instruments / organs...
  https://youtu.be/1XWo4ufMkG4   {-)

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david48

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #28 on: March 03, 2019, 11:11:01 PM »


Where do you find them , I know interweb  . excellent.
David
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Baldrick

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #29 on: March 04, 2019, 03:26:31 AM »

Mr Adams hopes his 12 grandchildren will enjoy the new family pet ,,, or perhaps the other way round !


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Martin [Admin]

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #30 on: March 21, 2019, 10:44:05 PM »


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Martin [Admin]

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #31 on: March 23, 2019, 06:41:22 PM »

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jaymac

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #32 on: March 24, 2019, 09:50:26 AM »

A father passing by his son's bedroom, was astonished to see the bed was nicely made, and everything was picked up. Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed, "Dad." With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands... "Dear, Dad. It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mum and you. I've been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of her because of her piercings, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much older than I am. But it's not only the passion, Dad. She's pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves, and trading it with the other people in the commune, for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it! Don't worry, Dad. I'm 15, and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit, so you can get to know your many grandchildren. Love, your son, Joshua.
P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Jason's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report that's on the kitchen table. Call when it is safe for me to come home!
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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #33 on: March 26, 2019, 01:56:08 PM »




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Martin [Admin]

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #34 on: March 31, 2019, 11:47:18 PM »

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warspite

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #35 on: April 01, 2019, 09:29:18 AM »

Martin - Sacrilege  {-)
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CGAux26

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #36 on: April 01, 2019, 02:44:40 PM »

Did anyone else notice signs that the Farmer Sam story is O-L-D?  Palm Pilot?  Dell computer?  That's OK-still funny.   {-) %%
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Netleyned

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #37 on: April 01, 2019, 03:05:37 PM »

RayBans are pound/dollar shop glasses now.
Ned
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Taranis

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #38 on: April 01, 2019, 04:34:28 PM »

I think they're Laybans these days Ned  {-)
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Netleyned

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #39 on: April 01, 2019, 05:04:11 PM »

RayBans LayBans oy vey :D :D
Ned
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Martin [Admin]

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #40 on: April 26, 2019, 10:54:15 PM »


The MATRIX.... the $10 version!

 {-) {-) {-) {-) {-) {-) {-) {-)


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tigertiger

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #41 on: April 27, 2019, 02:07:11 AM »

 :-)) :-)) :-))
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plastic

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #42 on: April 27, 2019, 07:05:32 AM »

That's a very clever parody.  :-))
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Taranis

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #43 on: May 21, 2019, 03:52:30 PM »





“Really!! That’s not what MY husband told me. He said they only cost a couple hundred”.
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ANDY
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meechingman

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #44 on: May 21, 2019, 04:13:18 PM »

Oh, Bu**er, my wife's just seen this!  %)
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dougal99

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #45 on: May 21, 2019, 04:34:06 PM »

.
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Martin [Admin]

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #46 on: May 25, 2019, 01:32:11 AM »

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Martin [Admin]

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #47 on: June 11, 2019, 05:18:18 AM »

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warspite

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #48 on: June 11, 2019, 09:49:27 AM »




“Really!! That’s not what MY husband told me. He said they only cost a couple hundred”.
Yes I highly recommend the bigger model, it means he will definitely be in the shed and have less time to be with his floosy
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warspite

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Re: Jokes & Humour - 2019
« Reply #49 on: June 11, 2019, 09:52:46 AM »

Noticed the E's missing, card board sign and measur-e - literacy isn't as good as it used to be (and I failed English)
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