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Author Topic: Plastic is leaving the building.....  (Read 2179 times)

BrianB6

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #25 on: October 21, 2020, 01:46:11 am »

p.s.   If anyone wants to talk about Prostate cancer, send me a private message.
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plastic

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #26 on: October 21, 2020, 05:28:25 am »

Make sure you keep one boat.
Where there is life, there is hope........

Good luck

Nord.
I totally agree - I'm keeping my old faithful - a Revell Flower Class - it just keeps working and has no value so I'll keep it just in case.   :-))
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plastic

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #27 on: October 21, 2020, 05:30:52 am »

I fully sympathise with you Plastic.   It is the thought of leaving those you love behind that is the worst of the diagnosis.   I have been fighting prostate cancer for 20 years and have gone through all the normal treatments.  At least I have been able to come to terms with the end but am not looking forward to it and leaving my family behind.

I have just started an experimental trial that might give me a little bit longer but I started it for what it might lead to in the future for others.
Do your 'Bucket' list and enjoy the time as best you can.
Best wishes for a long life - keep fighting - I am - I want to see my daughter's next birthday - and maybe my wife's too later in the year.   
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plastic

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #28 on: October 21, 2020, 05:33:25 am »


Don't feel guilty you have the privileged to tell them that you love them and you can enjoy the last days with them. not every one get that.

Why do I write that well I almost lost my wife to a blood clot in her brain 16 years ago and she was 35 at the time, it was not possible to communicate with her at all, saying you love her ect.  and you did not know what was going on, and believe me those 11min to the ENR with +100mph was scary ( I took her my self) so we celebrate every day that we can say good morning to each other, as we do not know what tomorrow brings.

Take care
Carsten

I wish you both well.    There's nothing like a brush with death to put all the small stuff into perspective.      It's all about family and loved ones.   Everything else is just 'noise'.   


 

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tigertiger

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #29 on: October 21, 2020, 07:53:14 am »

Even though we have never met I am sorry to hear your news. I admire your attitude immensely.
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warspite

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #30 on: October 21, 2020, 08:51:07 am »

Our condolences from the warspite crew, when the time comes, I hope I have as much courage to face what you and your family will go through.
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plastic

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #31 on: October 21, 2020, 09:13:24 am »

Thanks, everyone for your thoughts.

I'm concentrating on 'dying well' and maximising the good memories and closure for all our friends and family.     They will be left behind with all the grief and upset as I step into the next world.

This is such a strange place to be in.     At the moment, I feel mostly ok but things can go wrong at any time.     It's quite stressful monitoring my body for signs of the beginning of the 'sun dive'  (Hitchhiker's).
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SailorGreg

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #32 on: October 21, 2020, 11:51:08 am »

This is the third time I have started a reply.  Just don't know what to say.  You sound so calm and together, I admire your fortitude enormously. I wish you joy of your adventures in the months ahead and comfort in the love of your family.

Greg

(weird - we've done exactly the same number of posts to Mayhem!)

plastic

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #33 on: October 21, 2020, 12:41:45 pm »

Thankyou.

I'm the fittest I'm going to be right now.    I'm not going to get any fitter - so crying and going to pieces would waste valuable time.    It's real, practical action that's required now.       There will be plenty of time for tears when I deteriorate to the point at which I can't do what needs to be done any more.   I just hope that's about 2 seconds before I pass away.    :-))

I've listed a load of things on ebay this morning - all my prized toys and possessions that I've been collecting that I'm never going to get time to play with.   I want to leave as little mess and hassle for my wife to have to deal with.      Next will be a skip to get rid of the mountains of life's accumulations of 'crap' that 'will come in handy some day' - but never did.   %)
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grasshopper

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #34 on: October 21, 2020, 04:03:57 pm »

Respect....
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TheLongBuild

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #35 on: October 21, 2020, 05:07:42 pm »


I've listed a load of things on ebay this morning - all my prized toys and possessions that I've been collecting that I'm never going to get time to play with.   I want to leave as little mess and hassle for my wife to have to deal with.      Next will be a skip to get rid of the mountains of life's accumulations of 'crap' that 'will come in handy some day' - but never did.   %)


Sounded very familiar, what is your ebay name ?.

plastic

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #36 on: October 21, 2020, 06:00:41 pm »


Sounded very familiar, what is your ebay name ?.
I'd rather not identify myself to that much detail on an open forum.   ;)
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TheLongBuild

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #37 on: October 21, 2020, 06:27:32 pm »

Fair point.

Colin Bishop

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #38 on: October 21, 2020, 07:16:48 pm »

Quote
I'd rather not identify myself to that much detail on an open forum.

Plastic, you have shared your desperately sad situation with us and, like everyone else, I salute and admire your fortitude. I just hope that I will be so strong minded if and when the time comes.

By sharing your EBay ID here either publically or in response to PMs it might help maximise funds to assist yourself and your family in the coming months.

Colin
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plastic

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #39 on: October 22, 2020, 01:39:35 am »

Plastic, you have shared your desperately sad situation with us and, like everyone else, I salute and admire your fortitude. I just hope that I will be so strong minded if and when the time comes.

By sharing your EBay ID here either publically or in response to PMs it might help maximise funds to assist yourself and your family in the coming months.

Colin
Thanks         I know what you're saying re: ebay but I'd still rather not put the information on here.      It's mainly old synths and studio equipment if anyone is into that sort of thing.
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Dave

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #40 on: October 22, 2020, 04:38:00 pm »

Please don't ever give up the fight. I am a survivor (so far) of cancer so I know some of what you're going through you and you family need support and please don't be afraid to ask for it.


Take care of you and you loved ones.
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Thanks and regards

Dave

And if the band you're in starts playing different tunes...

Peter Fitness

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #41 on: October 22, 2020, 11:45:29 pm »

Like many others, I too am lost for words to say to you in this dreadful situation. At 54, you are the same age as our youngest son, so that really puts it into perspective for me. Your attitude is inspiring, and all I can say is, keep on fighting, and enjoy your remaining time to the utmost.


Peter.
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Martin [Admin]

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #42 on: October 22, 2020, 11:50:04 pm »


From Dave Jones (  Stavros ), via Facebook...


Could you please convey my sadness to plastic at his sad sad news gutted for him especially at his age it makes my problems insignificant and pathetic...

  Dave
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plastic

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #43 on: October 23, 2020, 07:31:19 am »

Thanks guys-  I'm really touched by your support during this terrible time.         I had a CT and PET scan yesterday to be the baseline for any chemo they can offer to measure the rate of the cancer growth.        From the symptoms I'm having, I'm scared that it's not going to be a long drawn out experience.       I'm genuinely terrified of 'the end'.     I've seen such horrors in hospices and the terrible deaths that I don't know how to deal with that.       I'm so upset by the thought of my wife and daughter having to cope without me.      It's so unfair.

Please say if this thread is too morbid or inappropriate for this site - I don't want to upset anyone.
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Martin [Admin]

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #44 on: October 23, 2020, 08:11:39 am »



We're your friends Plastic, we're here to share bad times as well as good!   :-)
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radiojoe

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #45 on: October 23, 2020, 09:32:33 am »

I second Martin we are with you all the way.
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Tug Fanatic

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #46 on: October 23, 2020, 10:14:36 am »

Thanks guys-  I'm really touched by your support during this terrible time.         I had a CT and PET scan yesterday to be the baseline for any chemo they can offer to measure the rate of the cancer growth.        From the symptoms I'm having, I'm scared that it's not going to be a long drawn out experience.       I'm genuinely terrified of 'the end'.     I've seen such horrors in hospices and the terrible deaths that I don't know how to deal with that.       I'm so upset by the thought of my wife and daughter having to cope without me.      It's so unfair.

Please say if this thread is too morbid or inappropriate for this site - I don't want to upset anyone.

Don't worry. You need support and we are all more than willing to offer it.

It is wonderful that you are being so positive and, although I am sure that there are very dark moments, I hope that you can maintain that attitude. The only difference between you and everyone else is that you have a timetable and that can be used as an opportunity.

There is something that you can do which is very positive for your loved ones. You can make sure that your family know everything that they need to know. I am sure that most of these things are already in place or will occur to you anyway but here goes. I obviously do not know your circumstances, and I am not asking, but you can make sure that any transition of responsibility for money and other issues goes smoothly. There are obvious things like your will but don't forget all those things that are in your name alone and which you loved ones will find difficult to access until probate is resolved. This can be particularly true with banks and insurance companies. I have also heard of cases where loved ones couldn't find records to know what was going on. Not being able to find and recognise all your savings account records could be a major problem. Does you wife know your online bank/savings accounts, power company, computer, phone and phone company, email etc passwords? Does she know that persons living alone pay reduced Council Tax but that they need to ask for it?



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plastic

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #47 on: October 23, 2020, 01:10:47 pm »

Don't worry. You need support and we are all more than willing to offer it.

It is wonderful that you are being so positive and, although I am sure that there are very dark moments, I hope that you can maintain that attitude. The only difference between you and everyone else is that you have a timetable and that can be used as an opportunity.

There is something that you can do which is very positive for your loved ones. You can make sure that your family know everything that they need to know. I am sure that most of these things are already in place or will occur to you anyway but here goes. I obviously do not know your circumstances, and I am not asking, but you can make sure that any transition of responsibility for money and other issues goes smoothly. There are obvious things like your will but don't forget all those things that are in your name alone and which you loved ones will find difficult to access until probate is resolved. This can be particularly true with banks and insurance companies. I have also heard of cases where loved ones couldn't find records to know what was going on. Not being able to find and recognise all your savings account records could be a major problem. Does you wife know your online bank/savings accounts, power company, computer, phone and phone company, email etc passwords? Does she know that persons living alone pay reduced Council Tax but that they need to ask for it?
We're going through all that now - changing logins, contact numbers, beneficiaries and anything else we can think of.      We have no secrets so she'll have access to my computer and e-mail to make sure any loose ends are tied up.

We've been together since school.     I've known her since the age of 11 and we started going out at 16.   we've been together just over 38 years.   We were married in 1990 so that's 30 years.      Moving forward will be so difficult for her - we've literally grown up together.
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Tug Fanatic

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #48 on: October 23, 2020, 02:07:59 pm »

That's good.

I know how you feel as I share your concerns about how my wife would cope both emotionally and practically. I met my wife at school and we have now been married nearly 50 years. We have no secrets (well I don't anyway) but we each have our areas of effective responsibility and we don't necessarily know everything about what the other one does nor how to do it. To give you two linked example.

I have long been interested in investing in shares which my wife knows little about & really isn't very interested except an inclination to panic on bad days. We have discussed how she would simplify it if anything happened to me so she could sleep at night.

I keep our financial records on a Spreadsheet. It came as a surprise to me that she hadn't realised that a spreadsheet can have multiple pages. If we hadn't discussed it I think that all the previous years pages would have been effectively lost.

I am not trying to worry you but rather encouraging you to think quite broadly and to spend time sharing, and if necessary explaining, your duties.


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Shipmate60

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Re: Plastic is leaving the building.....
« Reply #49 on: October 23, 2020, 05:46:58 pm »

For continuity have you considered putting your wife as a joint account holder?


Bob

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